Me & My Drab Life...

Bad things come in threes...

2011-09-30T10:04:00.001-07:00

Well first, my long due teeth cleaning turned out to be what I SOO afraid would happen... WISDOM TEETH extraction. Hell, I've already had FOUR good teeth extracted for my braces. And I soooooo hate it. Wisdom teeth is worse!! And TWO for that matter!

So yeah, had the extraction on Tuesday and it was so traumatizing. No kidding. The dentist was cute and gentle, but it didn't distract me from the pain. The anesthesia injection was horrible, he took almost half an hour trying to pull out the bottom wisdom teeth that he had to drill it into pieces for easier extraction (which still turned out to be pretty difficult that he actually SWEATED), and basically my mouth was tugged and prodded and etc. So I was then slapped with 3 days MC including that day.

And if I wasn't bleeding enough from that extraction, the next bad thing was the stupid menses. So you can imagine how much of a discomfort I was in. Slight fever, pain, sore gums, mentally drained from the ordeal, menses cramps. Man, this week is proving to be the most difficult days of this year.

And then came the final blow. My manager tendered her resignation. She was very nice and recommended me for promotion. I think same as before the truth hasn't really sunk in. Was busy cos returned to work after 3 days of MC, have some urgent things to settle. So haven't really had the time to really think about it and ponder what it all really means.

I'm glad that my efforts to improve were recognized. Though honestly I didn't think I was doing it on purpose to gain recognition or something like that. I just wanted to do my best in what I like. Not that in the past initially I didn't want to do my best. Just that perhaps the working culture is different. Maybe because for once, people have expressed their expectations for me and I didn't want to let them nor myself down.

But while I'm happy that I've improved (though still plenty of room for improvements, cos I don't think I'm anywhere near her standard), I'm just abit hesitant about my capabilities. I'm honored that she feels I'm capable and can do it, but somehow there's this uneasy feeling, that can I really meet up to their expectations? Can I really do my manager had been doing all these while? So far I see what I've been doing as her back-up or assistant. I'm still not really as hands-on as she is, though she thinks otherwise. Is it really that I think so little of myself? Even at my first appraisal, I find it hard to write in words what I do. Somehow she doesn't understand why (but then again, I also don't, so why should she? -_-).

Blabbering nonsense again I think. Anyway it's not a major SHOCK that she's leaving. But it's kind of sad how people around me are always leaving. Perhaps it's cos it's difficult for me to make friends that I can open up to. So when people go, somehow there's this sense of loss. Sure we can still meet up and all. But somehow the feeling is different. At least to me. I'm kinda weird in that way. Wonder why.

I know there are still nice ladies around. But somehow to me my manager is special because she is like the mentor I never had. She's not afraid to show her frustration at the things I didn't do right and "educate" me as she always says. I've learnt so much from her since I first came in here. Not just about work, but about attitude, values etc. I don't deny sometimes she can be abit harsh when she scolds, but she's one of the rare ones (if not THE ONLY one) who can scold me and I don't scold back or give black face etc. That's my way of saying I respect this person. (That said, not that I don't respect my hubby :p He's a different matter altogether.) Well I'm not exactly letting myself be a pushover. There are some rare times when I do talk back when I don't think I'm in the wrong lah.

I guess what I'm trying to say but probably won't say in her face is that I'll miss you damn loads. And thank you for all you've done for me.

- Phia signing off

Canon S95

2011-08-21T01:53:00.001-07:00

So loving my new camera! Some pics to show off! Other pics can be found from my Facebook... :p

- Phia signing off

New Toys!

2011-08-17T08:48:00.001-07:00

Went to sit the Singapore Flyer last weekend with my parents, sis and hubby. Used my sis's camera and fell in love with it! End up two days later I was about $700 plus poorer. -_-

I want to defend my decision in buying such an expensive camera. :p Sure, actually it is not a NEED. But I've been lemming for a digital camera FOR AGES. Yeah yeah, I know my daddy did give me a digital camera the other time and I used it like ONCE. After a few months of collecting dust at home, mom wanted to use a digital camera so I gladly returned it to her. :p

I guess I'm just the sort to take gifts for granted. If people give me stuff, quite likely I will not use it often unless it's something I must use everyday like bag, wallet etc. And that is also UNTIL I buy myself or someone gives me another similar item. Then it's out with the old, in with the new. :p

So anyway, I bought the digital camera because well, it's using MY OWN MONEY, so I'll feel the pinch if I do not use it. :x Another point, is that I'll need a digicam for when we go Taiwan. I don't like to borrow such gadgets or items from others because I HATE to be accountable for any damage to it and I'm quite accident-prone, careless, clumsy, well you get my drift. :p At least if I accidentally spoil or lose my camera, I'm only accountable to myself. :p

Well, the other toy is hubby's new iPhone 4! Refurbished, but for slightly less than $200, with about 1 1/2 years warranty, good deal I suppose! Anyway, it's all thanks to his cousin la, got staff price plans. So I recontracted my line under his name (cheaper price plan) and hubby bought the phone. He wanted to take my 3GS and I use the new phone. But I don't want the hassle of re-downloading my mangas, re-playing my games etc. So thank you very much, I rather keep my phone. Besides, I'll be pre-occupied with my new toy! :)

Think that's all for now. Nothing happening in my life liao I guess. Except for missing my ex-colleagues including the one that just left. :(

Talk more next time bah.

- Phia signing off

Time to let go...

2011-06-28T09:00:00.001-07:00

It's been coming 2 years since I've worked here.

There's been ups and downs as usual. Which is good, otherwise work's damn boring, life's too monotonous don't you think?

I'm glad to say I really like it here, like honestly. I feel so welcomed, so at home. I've learnt so much in these 2 years than my 4 years at my ex company. It's been a rough road at times, that I got quite depressed at one stage, sudden outburst of tears at work and even at home. Thank god that phase is over. Hopefully never to return!

I guess, I'm just melancholy cos my colleague just tendered her resignation. Somehow, the reality hasn't sunk in yet, or I'm too overwhelmed at work these few weeks that my mind can't process that info yet. But I do know I will miss her dearly. Though I may not say it out or show it, truth is, I'm crying as I'm typing this.

Perhaps I don't mean as much to you as much as you mean to me. I seldom 'click' with people, the anti-social me. Lol. But somehow, you mean more to me than others whom I know longer than you. Perhaps cos I can tell you anything and everything. In front of you I can be as crazy as I want, show my weaker side and just be myself.

Suddenly, I just feel like I'm losing a friend. I know it's silly to feel that way. But somehow, I feel like work is never gonna be the same without you.

But I'll still wish you all the best... In all that you do...

- Phia signing off

Memorable Birthday!

2010-10-22T10:00:00.000-07:00

Had a really wonderful and memorable birthday!

Hubs surprised me with tickets to Universal Studios Singapore about one or 2 weeks before my birthday cos I was in an emo period lately. So touched that he finally got his act together and gave me a surprise! :) And best of all, 3 of our friends are coming with us!

So anyway, headed out early for breakfast with William before taking bus down to Harbourfront. Took the monorial and we're finally there! Henry and Caining met us there abit later, so we roamed around USS first and took some pictures! Running around chasing after the characters around USS was pretty fun but tiring!

Watched a few shows and sat a few rides. My favourite was the Shrek 4D show (the effects were superb! Darn interesting!), Lights,Camera,Action! (special effects were awesome!), Rapids Ride (got fully drenched for the second time!) and Waterworld!

At Waterworld, was absoutely fun! The stunt show was just so amazing! BUT what made it memorable was what happened before the stunt show! The angmoh crew were going around using super soakers of some sort to splash the people sitting at the Soak Zone or Splash Zone. We sat at the last row of the Splash Zone. Then I act smart lah, took out umbrella and got marked by 2 of the crew! So both started attacking me with water left right! -_- And one of my friends sabohed me by saying it's my birthday today. So they gleefully pulled me all the one to the front of the auditorium infront of about 300 plus people and got them to sing Happy Birthday to me. -_- OMG. So malu can! Right after the song, lo and behold, kena soaked in water again! -_- but it was all fun la! :) I mean, such an experience is almost once in a lifetime kind of thing! :p So must be sporting mah!

Bought 2 memorabilia at USS - one tall bottle, and one Puss-in-Boots cup!

Anyway, had dinner and headed home, still damp from the soaking at the Waterworld and the ride! -_- showered and a few other friends came over to cut cake with me!

It has been a really enjoyable day!

Ok, heading to bed now! Need to wake up damn early for my bestie's wedding tomorrow! :p

Thank you so much lou gong zai for today! Love you muchies! :)

- Phia signing off

Location:Universal Studios Singapore

Busy October!

2010-10-10T07:07:00.001-07:00

So many things to do, so little time and money! :(

I've two weddings to attend! This means I need to buy new dresses and shoes! Especially when I have to be my bestie's sister in the day! Friends who know me know I don't wear dresses one la, so don't say I'm finding excuse to go shopping! -_-

Anyway, also going for facial, cos I haven't been for a facial for ages! Wanna go pamper myself! Going with hubby though! Let him enjoy and relax too!

OH OH OH! And hubby FINALLY woke up and gimme a surprise for my birthday! Heeeeeeee! ^_^ He hid something in my lingerie drawer. And kept asking me to keep my undies which he helped folded. So anyway after a long while, I didn't seem to be doing anything so he said he gave me my birthday surprise and I asked where. So he said he already gave me a big hint when he nagged me to keep my undies. So I found the love letter (2 hearts folded together) and well, it was folded on an acknowledgement letter for 2 tickets to Universal Studios! Whoopeedoo!!!! So happy la! <3 though I feel bad he is spending so much. But I heart heart him for the effort he made, with the booking of the tickets, hiding the love letter for me to find. It may not be an expensive card, a luxurious bag or holiday, but to me, this is all I want. The effort. Even if it's not a trip to Universal Studios, the love letter and effort trying to make a surprise for me is enough. :)

Ok, and then end of the month going to A Famosa in Melaka to celebrate his youngest niece's birthday! Can't wait! I miss miss miss little Juicy!

Anyway, just love love hubby to bits! Thank you for this wonderful birthday surprise! Even if it rains, nothing can dampen my mood!

- Phia signing off

Cooking!

2010-09-15T23:01:00.001-07:00

I don't know what's coming over me, but lately have been interested in cooking! Yeah imagine that! Lazy bum me! Lol!

I first experimented with desserts: snow fungus with gingko nuts and dunno what else, green bean soup with sago and apple with pork ribs soup. Then I cooked rice with grilled fish and lotus root soup. And yesterday, salmon don with miso soup! Haha...

Ok, granted, miso soup is those instant kind, salmon of cos is ready-packed kind. So basically I just cooked rice and mixed the sushi rice seasoning. Simple enough no? :p So anyway, overall tastes pretty ok, surprisingly! Haha! Well, I can't wait to go to Daiso and buy those moulds to make cute onigiriis, since now I know how to make sushi rice!

Hmmm, I guess cooking is kind of fun in a way. I think it's rather the cooking AND cleaning part that I don't like. I don't mind cleaning up, just not both. And yeah I don't like having anyone next to me when I'm cooking. Because nagging really annoys me, even if you were only giving kind suggestions. Yeah, I get it that you are trying to help, I do appreciate it, but I am the one cooking, so leave me be!

Another day to the weekend again! Can't wait! Looks like I've loads of things to do:
1) Go IKEA shopping - need floor lamp for my MBR for me to read my books, and other stuff, whatever that catches my fancy!
2) Go for a movie with hubs - he owes me quality time, since he was working two weekends ago, and last weekend was spent entertaining others!
3) Sleep!

Can't remember what else le... Anyway lunchbreak over, back to work!

- Phia signing off

Long Weekend!

2010-09-11T07:27:00.001-07:00

It's been such a busy long weekend! Didn't have much time for myself! But it's ok; it's been great fun!

Friday night I had my JC mates over for dinner. Ordered pizza and finger food... Lazy to cook! Finally saw my dear godson whom I haven't seen for so so so long, regrettably! My my, he's becoming such a handsome young lad! :) But super duper hyper! I think it's a guy's trait! It's so entertaining and yet tiring to watch him... Makes me wonder if I really do want a kid! Maybe a girl wouldn't be so bad? :p Anyway, it was great having them over and catch up with each other! Really ought to make it a monthly affair!

Saturday night had my mother-in-law over with his 2nd sis's 3 kids and his youngest sis's family. Pity my dear Juicy isn't here! Missed her la! :p Well, so I cooked soup, prepared grilled fish while hubs fried some veges. Hmmm... Not too bad I suppose... Though the grilled fish could be better! Forgot to put some salt and maybe some herbs will make it even nicer. Should have learnt from my mum the other time! But then again, she's always nagging and scolding, so I just don't have the patience to learn from her. Anyhow, dinner was a success overall!

Tomorrow probably will sleep in, and just laze around at home. Maybe go Expo look at running shoes, or go West Mall for mooncake shopping? Or maybe movies... See how lah. Quite tired after 2 evenings to entertaining guests. Want some ME time! :p

Work's ok I guess. Need to learn to be more proactive and follow up on matters on hand, which most of the time I tend to forget or procrastinate. -_-

Oh well, now to watch New Moon which I bought on Friday! And then shower and sleep! :p

- Phia signing off

Home Sweet Home...

2010-07-06T09:59:00.001-07:00

Been staying at our house for almost a week already! (I think!) And am soooo loving it! Still haven't really make it a home because still got lots of stuff haven't buy or do!

Like my fridge is only coming tomorrow, so tomorrow evening's agenda is to go grocery shopping! I so need to stock up on my drinks (milk, soft drinks/packet drinks) and food (eggs, sauces, etc). Lol... So looking forward la!

And I still don't have a microwave oven, toaster, rice cooker etc! Lol! Oh, and the egg contraception, whatever it is called - used to cook soft boiled eggs! Anyone wanna sponsor me some cooking utensils, etc? Lol!

And I still am lemming for a pretty wall decal for our MBR! Not to mention getting two standing lights for the sides of our bed. Because the MBR light is quite dim, which is my intention (cosy, dreamy feel mah!), but I realized that I also do spend quite a fair bit of time in bed reading! I can't possibly read in that kind of lighting! But this will have to wait I suppose! Need to save some moolah first.

Then I still have to get a DVD/VCD player cum recorder so that I can watch my DVDs and record those shows on TV that I will be missing! Like tonight, I missed the 9pm drama! Probably need to head back to my parents' to watch it. -_-

Hmmm... What else? Dining table also haven't bought, so I suppose will need to sit on the floor to eat. Haha... Didn't see one that caught my eye. Saw one last time at IKEA, and wanted to buy, but hubs say wait. Ok lor, wait until now out of stock liao and don't know if any more new stock coming in or not. Sian. Am looking for those wooden ones, like those for outdoor patios, picnics, etc. I think it's quite pretty and will match nicely with the dining area!

Oh ya, and haven't signed up for Starhub broadband too. So can't surf net on my comp nor watch cable tv. :(

Also need to get a steamboat set, wine glasses, so that can enjoy la! :) Oh yah, and also need bar counter chairs. -_- Can't seem to find affordable and taller ones! Sigh...

Think that's all for now... Otherwise am settling in quite perfectly! It's awesome to come back to a home that's WHOLLY yours. And hubs'. :p

Money money money no enough to buy all my things though... -_-

Anyway, just bought a knife set and kettle today! It's metallic blue in colour! So pretty! Hehe! And it's those whistling kind, something that I've always wanted to have! I find it quite cute mah! Lol!

Also bought a pair of big fluffy bedroom slippers! Ducky! Hehe! Though I still want to have one Elmo and Piglet type of bedroom slippers for obvious reasons. :p

Will take and post pics this weekend, because by the time I get back, it's evening time, and the pictures won't look as nice nor do justice to my pretty abode! :p

Now going to sleep, hopefully hubby and his friend won't be too noisy when watching the World Cup match in the living room! Wish I can join them, but too bad, gotta work! -_-

- Phia signing off

So Proud of Hubby...

2010-06-26T11:01:00.001-07:00

Hubs so li hai, managed to trim the blinds and installed them all by himself! And also changed the letterbox lock too! Of course after I nagged him endlessly la...

Not forgetting to mention, he did all the housework, like cleaning the floor, saw off excess of the bamboo poles etc. While yours truly just laze on her bean bag and sofa and enjoy the TV that was just delivered today! =x

It's times like this that make me feel so blessed to have him as my hubby. Sure, he's irritating as hell sometimes when he's just SO SLOW. He's absolutely not romantic, well occassionally when I nag or complain. He frustrates me when he gives so many negative comments when I want to buy some stuff.

But despite all these, he makes up for it in other ways, such as doing the housework, being my handyman around the house, things like that. He doesn't expect me to do anything or nag me as I would to him. =x I think because he knows it's a futile attempt... Lol!

So thank you my dear lou gong zai! Muacks...

Anyway, hubs promised that we will stay overnight at our new house tomorrow night! Yay! My silk blanket! My 1000 thread count Egyptian Cotton bedsheets! Hehehe... I think most of my soft toys are at our home le. Though I still have loads to pack from my parents' place. Not sure how I'm gonna bring everything to our home... I'm still lacking my bookshelf! I have got so many story books lor! Enough to fill a big box definitely! -_-

Well, took our first shower there tonight too! I so love our rainshower! And my MBR bathroom! Everything is just so perfect... But let the loan repayment begin! -_- But no regrets... I'm so glad we renovated the house! It's like my dream home come true! ^_^

So excited la! Taking leave on Monday and Tuesday to move our stuff from our respective old homes to OUR home! Can't wait to start living there for good! :p

- Phia signing off

Our Love Nest!

2010-06-24T09:21:00.001-07:00

Finally, our house is finally ready! Just pending a few minor kinks that our contractor needs to iron out. Taking leave on Mon and Tues next week to move in! Seems like mission impossible though. -_-

Anyway I'm so glad to see our dream home materialized! I'm so loving my bean bag and other luxury items that I have been bad on insisting; like my silk blanket, 1000 thread count Egyptian cotton bedsheet. =x I can't wait to move in lah! ^_^

So just some pics to share...

- Phia signing off

My First Medal...

2010-05-29T23:50:00.001-07:00

Yeap, what a great accomplishment! So proud of myself even if others may mock me... :p

My lover asked me to accompany her for the 10km run by Addidas Sundown Marathon 2010. Wah lao, the longest distance I've ran, or rather walked, is probably the 2.4km in JC lor. Once in a blue moon, I'll go to the gym and jogged/walked for only half an hour! Lol!

So anyway I signed up for the 10km one with my lover. Haha, end up by yesterday, I still haven't trained! And the last time I exercised was probably half a year ago... :x

So anyway, we were late for the event because the shuttle bus service sucks la. And both of us hurriedly went to start the race. Hahaha, I barely jogged half km already started walking. -_-

Lover jogged ahead of me, so I told her to continue without me. I'll probably die first. Lol! But overall it wasn't too bad; the weather was quite good and it's night time, so I still can manage to complete the race!

Though when I was reaching finishing point, I tried to run the final stretch but end up I could feel my calves cramping, so I didn't dare push myself. I walked and tried again, but legs started cramping yet again so I give up la. :p

Haha, so that's how I got my first medal! Jogging and walking, though granted I walked most of the way la! But to me, that's such an achievement! Especially since I am such a lazy person. :p

But hor, now my legs ache hellava lot! -_- Haiz. But not bad la, I still can get up today to go to his friend's wedding. :p

Will I go run again? Probably if it's a night time event. I think daytime one is too jialat for me la. -_- I'll probably die of heatstroke first. Haha...

- Phia signing off

Our Love Nest Update

2010-05-24T20:02:00.001-07:00

Yah la, I lazy to update! Hubs is more excited than me. But I am not excited earlier because there's nothing to look what! All the cement, blah blah blah... So ugly!

But now more or less looks more like an empty house instead of some decrepit dump, so yeah, starting to get so excited when they finish my rooms' laminatings and carpentry starts! Oh can't wait to finally see the end product! And move in!

Here are some of the 3D drawings for our love nest!

View of barcounter front and part kitchen...

View of barcounter back and part dining area...

View of kitchen...

View of storeroom...

View of MBR and wardrobe...

View of MBR toilet...

- Phia signing off

Idiot Car Owners Who Piss Me Off!

2010-05-24T17:44:00.001-07:00

Some drivers never fail to piss me off! Morons, especially those who go park their damn blardy cars at motorcycle lots! Annoys the hell out of me lah!

- Phia signing off

Some progress finally!

2010-04-15T09:12:00.001-07:00

Yay! Finally confirmed an ID company tonight! Ideal House ID!

Took us so long to finally decide on one ID lor! The quotation they gave us was the cheapest so far. And after much research, it appears that their workmanship is quite ok and their pricing affordable and reasonable. Thus without further ado, I confirmed them as my ID. :p And plus, I was quite impressed with the coordinator Sean. He's patient with me and very prompt. I mean, in the morning he went on site to survey our house, in the evening he sent us the revised quotation! That's pretty fast as compared to most other IDs that we had approached so far lor.

Hopefully he doesn't disappoint us and continue such excellent service! I'm so looking forward to him doing the 3D layout and starting on helping us build our IDEAL HOME! :)

I Wanna Go Ikea!

2010-04-12T16:33:00.001-07:00

Haha... I've always wanted to go Ikea to do shopping for house furniture, beddings and etc. Don't ask me why! I just do!

Anyway now lemming to buy a nice nice quilt from there. That's like the top of my list. I wanna go there to buy other stuff like house decor items, fancy lamps, etc. But these can wait till I've saved enough I suppose!

But quilt, I don't know why, I wanna buy asap. Haha... I wanna get a REALLY good one. I've always loved the huge, fluffy and soft blanket that is used in those higher class hotels! I so love the feeling of burrowing underneath the sheets! Besides, the bed is the 2nd place u spend most of your time at, (first one is work of course! -_-) so I TOTALLY want only the BEST for my bed! I don't care if I have to spend a bomb... It's my ultimate wish for my own home!

I so can't wait to go to Ikea! At least to go try and figure which quilt I want! :p Bedsheets and quilt cover... Dunno... Maybe wait till there's sales!

Anyway now on the bus, quite hungry actually... Haha...

Busy busy bumblebee!

2010-04-07T06:45:00.001-07:00

Yeap, it's been such a hectic weekend and week so far! Weekend as you already know, went expo twice (once with hubby, another with hubby and my friend and her fiancé). Then went to IMM to get more quotations, had dinner at his sis's place.

Monday after work went shopping for toiletbowls, basins, taps, rainshowers and kitchen sink. After which went shopping for a colleague's birthday present.

Tuesday took half day leave because went to help my best friend choose her wedding gown. Goodness! So much work and so troublesome lor! But it was quite fun la. Plus meeting up with Joyce and Debbie always makes me happy! :) Anyway, we also went to Joyce's new house - The Pinnacle. Quite nice lah, but going to the Sky Bridge quite leychey lor... After that, had dinner at Sembawang Park with his parents, sis, bro-in-law and his parents. And of course the little one was there! Super cute lor! Heart heart her to bits! ^_^

Today actually after work was supposed to go to IMM again to meet up with one of the ID company to get the quotation, but end up the meeting was postponed. So just went to have a good dinner and take it easy, because next few days are gonna be busy too! Have to finalize an ID by end of this week, finish buying other stuff like kitchen hob and hood, bi fold doors, etc. Sigh... Money no enough!

Work is getting more and more hectic. Learning new stuff and taking on more responsibilities. Trying desparately not to make any mistakes! I learn things fast, do things slow but usually will be faster once I get the hang of it. For now still trying hard to do well at my job! Hopefully all goes well especially since my boss will be on leave for almost a week! -_-

Oh well, anyway now waiting for mum to come back and see how much money we can borrow from her to pay for our renovation. Gonna cost us at least S$35k - S$40k I think. Well, at least it is to our design for our house!

Let's pray that this year will be a smooth sailing year for us both!

Damages Done To Our Wallets...

2010-04-04T03:07:00.001-07:00

This weekend has been really fruitful; finally saw some progress towards our new home!

Went to Expo and there were a few fairs, so we visited them all. We bought laminated flooring from Power Dekor, Philips 47inch TV, Lotus sofa and mattress, TV console and coffee table. Went to IMM and got a fan with lighting and sought for more quotations for renovations. Probably going Expo again end of next week to get the doors, grilles etc. And hopefully can confirm the ID by end of next week!

Fridge, washing machine and air-conditioner will be settled by his bro-in-law since he can get a good price for us. So now what's remaining is the cooking hood and hob, lightings, toilet bowls, basins and taps. Think we can settle them tomorrow.

So excited lah! :) Can't wait for renovation to start!

Department dinner @ Swissotel!

2010-03-31T06:31:00.001-07:00

Had a yummy buffet dinner tonight! So full now and listening to the comparisons of quotations... Why am I not paying attention? Too many details, listen until blur... Anyway, but I love the 3D layout of the house! I tell you, if we end up signing contract with them, I'm so gonna love the house!

Back to dinner, took pictures of what I had... Yummy lor! But sadly, I didn't eat as much as I used to be able to. :( Anyway, just some pictures to show...

Photos...

2010-03-30T07:35:00.001-07:00

The wonders of technology! I can actually blog on my phone while lying on the bed! Going to zzz soon... Just testing this BlogPress that I just downloaded. Seems easy enough to blog! Plus adding of pictures is a breeze as compared to blogging using my laptop! But then again maybe because I haven't tried posting pictures via my blog on my laptop... :p

Anyway, just to share some of my fav photos!

- ah phia signing off...

House Keys!

2010-03-24T05:42:00.001-07:00

Finally got our keys to our house and now busy trying to get the best quotation for renovating our love nest! I think it's cute how hubby terms it as that! Lol.

Well I'm quite passive about this whole renovation. I hope he doesn't think that I'm not interested. Let's put it this way; I don't really care much about how he intends to renovate because I've seen his works and it suits me ok. Of course I did give my 2 cents worth if there's something in particular that I don't like. I just have zero design sense. My opinions will just be so off; I'll probably mix Oriental with say Modern and in a weird way. So I'm just letting him have full rein of the house design and all. When the house is completed, that's where I come in with all the small decorative stuff for the house! Lol...

As of now, I really won't be of much help, only telling him what I like and see if he can incorporate it in the house layout. I guess my nonchalance is also due to the fact that basically my whole life used to be mapped out by my dad. So I don't have much opinions independently. -_-

So anyway, am on my last day of MC. Was down with bad bout of flu and cough that for once in a long time, I was given 2 days of MC. I kind of miss work. At least now not coughing as badly. And the endless sneezing has stopped so far. -_-

Actually I'm quite excited to see the end product of the house! I just know it's gonna be awesome and damned to anyone else who thinks otherwise! Haha... I'm just so proud of hubby for handling this whole phase on his own. From researching, designing, planning, getting quotation, etc. It's really hard work and I'm just so glad he didn't force me to partake in this, though I should lah. But too many cooks spoil the broth... If I give too many opinions, it's either I get annoyed when he rejects them (even if for the right reasons), or he'll get more frustrated with my useless ideas or impractical plans, or we'll just argue and fight trying to compromise. Think like this is better. He does what he does best, I do what I do best. I'll do stuff like handling paperwork, reading through contracts, etc. He'll do all the hands-on things like design, liaising with contractors etc. :p

Ok, going to shower now... Till the next time!

CNY and a Fucked Up Man!

2010-02-21T09:09:00.000-08:00

CNY was great! Had a good time at his hometown with him and his family... Dunno why but I feel so much at ease when I'm with his family than mine. Quite bad right. Haha.

Though lots of things happen. Dunno why but I damn suay lah. First I got drunk and fell when I leaned against the motorbike. Scrapped my elbow. -_- Got back home to puke my guts out and making a mess which his poor daisou had to help clean up after me. Second, lost money at mahjong la. Haha... But is ok! Not alot and in ringgit, so just take it as paying for entertainment lor! Third, having a fight with hubby. Well mostly my fault la. I PMS-ing lor. Lastly, having rashes there and when back. Think weather too hot liao.

Anyway took MC on Friday cos of rashes. Felt bad cos I keep thinking of work. All the emails and work when I go back to work tomorrow. Sigh...

But I mainly wanna complain about that idiot bro-in-law of his!! Not Desmond nor his eldest sis's husband la. They are like Mr Nice Guy. But the one that he's living with now is a different matter. He's easily one of the worst man on earth lor! I just have to vent out or I'll just have all these anger inside me!

It's not just me who has issues with him. EVERYONE has issues with him. He seriously is going to get it from us one of these days. Just dunno by who. Haha! But seriously lor. If everyone is bitching about him, there's really something not right with this fella.

He hits his daughters like nobody's business. Nothing wrong with disciplining kids right? But the way he does it is like sooooo wrong lor. How can you slap a Pri 3 or 4 girl in the face? You are a man leh. Your strength is not exactly little. It's really those fierce, tight slaps not those smacks ok. Sooner or later you are going to burst her eardrums slapping her like that. If he ever disciplines his kids like that in front of me, you can bet your arse that I'm not going to sit there and do nothing.

Then at his hometown, he shouted at his nephew for throwing stones at somebody else's car. HELLO! Number 1, that is not your kid. You have no right to discipline him. Secondly, you have even no bloody right to still have that murderous glare at him even while walking away! Thirdly, it is YOUR own son who did the deed not your nephew! Bloody hell. I was soooo pissed off esp when I see the poor nephew tearing after I hurriedly pull him to the back of the house to sayang him.

And at his hometown, the same stupid man pissed off sooo many people. The first was when he just switched channel while the whole clan was watching tv. No asking of permission, no apologies, NOTHING! As if he has the right to do so! Hello, this is not your bloody house. Second, this is not your tv. It is Desmond who paid for it. Thirdly, everyone is watching the tv. Don't you have any manners nor sense of courtesy to at least ask if can switch channel?

The second was when he was soooo rude and farted in hubby's bro's face! No apologies neither! Cos the bro was sitting on the floor or sth, and that stupid man who was sitting on the sofa just lifted his butt, farted and never say a word! And he did that not once but TWICE! What the hell!! At least apologize la! So hard to say sorry meh???

The third was that night all of us got drunk. I was busy puking in the outside toilet and half sleeping inside. Hubby was waiting for me until he fell asleep in the small drain outside the toilet. That stupid man came to the back dunno do what, saw him sleeping there and went to the living room and told daisou "they intend to sleep outside ar." And daisou came to check on us. Then she turned around wanting to ask him for help to pick hubby up, but the stupid man had gone back to the room to sleep! What the hell lor!! Where got people like that one??? Luckily hubby still can get up when daisou tried to wake him up lor! But this stupid man is really one bloody kind!

Another thing that I learnt from daisou also infuriated me lor. Her son was staying with this stupid man since he came to Singapore to study. And his bro had a history of gambling and etc. And the latest 9pm drama serial talked about this husband who lost money in his business ventures and escaped reality by hiding in the room. While this stupid man and hubby's man were watching this show and that particular scene, this stupid man actually called his nephew out from the room where he was studying and said things like see lah, same like your father right and asked where his father hide to during that time. Wah lao eh. How can you attack a kid like that! He's here without his own family, defenceless and innocent. How would you like it if I ask your kids about you raking up huge credit card bills and your wife having to help you clear your debt? Never mind, then the poor boy just answer "don't know, you want to know ask my mother". Wah, and his sis can scold him saying how can he be rude and talk back when his uncle is just asking him something! What the hell lor! And his sis can later go back to complain to their mother that her grandson is rude, talking back to her husband! Wah kao! The pot calling the kettle black!!!!!!

The latest issue with him is regarding the aircon installation at the hometown. It came up because it was so hot there and since only the first room had aircon, everyone thought it will be a good idea to install aircon in all the other rooms and living room. So hubby's bro, Desmond and hubby decided to chip in for this. So out of courtesy his youngest sis asked the second sis if she wants to chip in, since they will also benefit from it. Though everyone expected that her husband will not be in favour of it. Initially she said ok, then the stupid man or his wife la, called daisou and then the parents and make a huge fuss. End up he replied to both hubby's youngest sis and husband that "after much consideration, we are not supportive of this unreasonable, impractical and stubborn plan". Yup, that is what he wrote!! What the hell right!!! Just a simple no we will not chip in will suffice. Do you need to be so rude? Obnoxious idiot stupid man! Then bloody hell you don't use the aircon when you go back!

Honestly, this type of man really gets on my nerves. I can't wait for the day hubby moves out of there and I can stop greeting him jiefu. Hell. Such people do not deserve any respect at all! Certainly not from me! And then when hubby moves out, he dare step on my tail, he better watch out. I will not tolerate any nonsense from him. Mark my words.

Emo-ing Time

2010-01-26T08:25:00.001-08:00

Don't know why, but have been quite emo these days! Nope I'm not pregnant! My period's about to be over! (too much info right?hahaha)

Well, went to Malaysia again last weekend. This time to visit my grandparents, because well, the dowager had gave the instructions for all of us to go back. And well, truth be told I haven't been back to visit them for at least a year...

Well, hard to lah. When my parents go back to Malaysia, it's either I have something on or his has something on and I rather accompany him. We haven't got our own car either, so it's abit inconvenient. And well, if I had to choose between visiting his side and my side, I'll choose his any time.

But seeing kong kong so old now, and having a stroke sometime back, I can't help but wonder... Where has time gone? What have I done or achieved in life? Why haven't I done more to be more active in my grandparents' lives? In my parents' lives? Why aren't I more sociable and caring towards my family?

Sometimes I feel like I have so much regrets in life and yet I don't do anything about it. Perhaps I don't know how. Perhaps I feel it's too late. How to forge a better relationship with my parents and grandparents? I don't know how to speak dialect with the latter, so I can't communicate much with them. And we almost never talk, so I don't know what to say to them. With my parents, well, let's just say we don't communicate as much due to my younger days experiences. We are just not as close as I'd hoped. You know, like how some parents are actually friends with their kids? I want that kind of relationship, but that has been such far off since young. And it's too late now to try and salvage, much less cultivate such a relationship. But I do love my daddy so so much. I'll never forget how much he used to love me and showing it. Not that he doesn't now... But I missed those days when i'm just his little girl and he being my hero. I just want to be his little girl again. But all these are words that won't come out. What comes out are usually curt replies when I'm not in the mood, talking back when I feel that he's being naggy, nonchalant
replies when I'm busy doing mundane stuff, etc. I guess I'm just brought up this way, not expressive towards family.

Well, Monday was Ivory's wedding dinner. Somehow I just feel like crying. Thinking of how we used to be so close at my ex-company. And now finally she's married! Well, by right she was long married lah. Just that she had her wedding dinner like, half a year later? I don't know. Just felt so touched and glad to be at her wedding dinner. I wish them both a blissful marriage and to stay true and loving till the end of time!

Well, I hope this emo phase will blow over soon! I hate feeling so emo! Ok, it's late now, going to sleep and I hope my neck and throat will feel better before this weekend!

Happy 2010!

2010-01-14T03:21:00.000-08:00

Ok ok, quite belated I know. Been busy - went to Hong Kong from 29 Dec 09 - 9 Jan 10, went to his hometown on 9 Jan 10, back to work on 11 Jan 10. So have been busy at work from 11 Jan till now. Haha... But am loving my work! =) Because seems like everything is going smoother so far...

Anyway, I miss Hong Kong! I miss the cold weather (even though I caught the flu buy on the 4th day? -_-), dim sum, food, the lifestyle, not working and just enjoying myself, his sis's family especially the kids! Haha... Oh, and I definitely miss the fashion there! And the toys! But I'm quite lazy and tired to blog about the trip, so just see my hubby's pictures! (A picture is worth a thousand words!) He also did try blogging daily, kudos to him! I was so tired by the time I got back, and all I wanted to do was stone. LOL. But I think he was impressed that I can walk so much without any complaints! Haha... Usually I'd have complained, want to take cab, want to sit and rest, want to go home.Yah lah, typical spoilt brat. But I guess the weather played a part. It's so cold and cooling, hard to get annoyed. =p Here, it's so hot, which makes me hot-tempered, plus if I'm tired, my temper gets worser, and plus if I'm sick, that's it, I'm staying home! Ok, anyway, want to know more about my HK trip just see Aaron's blog.

After we landed in Singapore, we headed over to his sister's place at Punggol, unpack some stuff, rush back to our houses to put other food stuff and the luggages. Then off we went, back to his hometown. Only got back on Sunday night (more like 2 plus in the morning!).

Went back to work and saw 199 emails (none of it is spam mail!). Almost fainted. Hahaha... So started clearing my mails, do my work... Looking forward to the weekend so I can sleep late!

Hmmm, nothing much liao. *goes off to watch TV!*

Woohoo!

2009-12-09T21:41:00.000-08:00

Haven't been updating this for what? *checks* A month! Haha...

Work is going along fine. The lady that I'm taking over from will be leaving already. So I'm going to be ALL BY MYSELF! >_< Nah, I still got my manager and the lady is still around here at another department, so I'm still alright! Hopefully I just be more careful at work. -_-

Anyway, woohoo, so many exciting things happening! Until I'm quite tired actually... LOL! Not enough sleep and well, no more night shift, so cannot sleep until 10.30am! LOL. And plus, these few days went to work myself, so once I'm aboard the bus, I'll doze off until I reach my workplace. -_- Yeah. Hopefully I didn't snore! That will be quite ermm... embarrassing.

Ok, so what's all the hype about? Hahaha... Got my iPhone finally! =p After LOADS of waiting, I end up still getting it from Singtel. -_- To summarize, expensive phone, cheaper plan, but ok lah! =p Poor hubby has been hearing me drone on and on, nagging on the pros and cons of getting the iPhone from this telco, this plan, blah blah blah. And when I finally decided, it's another round of anxiety of whether I made the right choice or not, and so I go on and on and on ala Titanic song. -_- So yah, I think hubby deserves alot of praises for being able to tolerate me and my nonsense and my fickle mind! =p

So where was I? Oh yah, my iPhone! So my sis so kindly bought me a pretty Speck Candyshell casing as my birthday present despite being sick. Poor girl. And so after two days of holding it at home, I'm FINALLY using it, and trying to act damn pro with it lah. =x Downloaded a few really cute applications. Did lots of research before buying this phone ok! Already had a list of applications and games to download, and the casing that I need. =x Kiasu lah. Typical Singaporean leh...

So am bringing my new baby to HK end of this month! Gonna look for a nice pouch for it. Well, my sis and bro have been giving me an earful for wanting to add bulk to my phone, but well, I need lots of protection for it since it's gonna be in my huge bag with loads of rubbish in it! It's bound to be shaken, bumped and tossed about. It needs some anti-shock protection! LOL. So anyway, yah, coming to my next point, HK! Yeah! Can't wait to see his niece and enjoy my holiday! ^_^ And it's the cold season there! Can wear my beloved trench coat, IF I can still fit in it! =( Dang, I must start making a list of what to bring liao!

Ok lah, I'm so rambling on and lunch-time's almost over. So I'm off for a quick puff and back to work later! =p Ta for now!

Lalalalala...

2009-10-28T22:30:00.001-07:00

So far work's fine; abit of information overload though! Trying to learn and remember as much as I can. Don't know if it's better that I've worked in education industry before so it's easier to pick up stuff or is it better that I haven't worked in education industry before so it'll be easier to remember things and not get confused by previous company's terms, lingo, etc. LOL. Now have to relearn the terms, lingo used. -_- But other than that, I'm quite happy here, but missing my ex-colleagues. =|

Nothing else much to talk about. Haha. He's busy with his job and working so much harder there. I told him it's not that it's working so much harder. It's just that he has been slacking too much on his job for the past few years. Haha. Oh well, hopefully his hard work will pay off and he can get a substantial pay raise after confirmation! Anyway, so after work, he'll be too tired, and I'll be too buzzed so we'll just go have dinner together and go home rot and sleep early. For the FIRST TIME since like forever, I slept at 11.30pm last night! -_- Usually I don't sleep before 1am. LOL. But yesterday had such a bad migraine, so head off to bed earlier.

Friday meeting his sis and family for dinner, celebrating his niece's birthday! Yipee! =D Miss that little Juicy! =p Haha... She's just adorable. =) Must remind hubby to bring his camera and take loads of photos! Anyway, weekend, don't know do what. Probably go watch movie. I have so many movies I want to watch!

Haeundae: The Deadly Tsunami

500 Days of Summer

Poker King

Love Happens

My Sister's Keeper

My Girlfriend is an Agent

Sigh, so many movies, but such an expensive 'hobby'! =(

Now that most of the current goals are settled, going to aim for the iPhone! =p Can't wait for those end-of-the-year sales and promotions! And then it's the Hong Kong trip! YES!!!!!!

Interesting Message...

2009-10-18T07:48:00.000-07:00

Heh, not the first time my picture has conned other guys... =x Got this in my Facebook Inbox:

Hi

I am pretty new in this medium and true i was introduced here by a colleague of mine who attested to the fact that
responsible people abound here. Well he found his soul mate here too!

I am new also at this method of meeting a soul mate but I am very determined to give it my best short. I came across your photo and I liked the simplicity of your looks,quite fascinating and I would like to get to know more about you if you are interested.

I am a medical doctor, pediatricians to be precise, hobbies......hmmm....laughing, i like to think I have a great sense of humour and I like relaxing with that special person...walking hand in hand along the seaside and I also love to dance and swim too. If you are interested do reach me back ok?

lot of thots

Paul.

Hmmm, sorry, but you're too late... =p Righy hubby? ^_^

Anyway, nothing much this weekend. Still sick and coughing. Abit breathless at times, coughing like mad, but better compared to Friday. That day was absolutely horrible. -_-

Can't wait to go back to work honestly! LOL! =x

New Job, New Chapter in Life...

2009-10-14T09:10:00.001-07:00

Well, tomorrow (or rather later, LOL), I'm starting my new job. =)

So far so good; the salary is higher (S$400 more than my last pay), the benefits better (S$300 holiday claims amongst others - will know more tomorrow), and my position higher (Assistant Manager). Well, I hope I can meet up to the expectation! I will do my best, don't worry! No more slacking. Time to really be more mature and excel in what I can do. =) Well, with such good benefits, how can I not prove my worth right? =p

Anyway, so my job's settled, my house more or less settled (though can only move in late next year, but who cares?), hubby found a better paying job and it's something he has a passion for, so basically, Sophia's a happy girl! ^_^ Not only that, I'm truly blessed with a doting daddy. =) He's super sweet lah. I smsed him that I've got a job, my position and pay and this is what he replied: "Very good. Fantastic. Please keep it nicely. Get some good cloth. Let me know if you need help." Haha... So cute right? =p And he even gave me S$400 to buy some new formal wear! I was so pai seh to accept from him lor. But he keep insisting, so I don't have much choice. So nice right? I love my daddy alot, even though I sometimes throw temper at him. -_-

Only thing that saddens me is not being able to celebrate my birthday with Bui. =( I miss her so much! And Lyna! Sigh... It just won't be the same without them really. =( I heart you two most! Of course and the 2 Shars... LOL... But I'm closer to Bui and Lyna... Sigh... Really miss miss heart heart them!

Oh, and then I told them both the news, and hubby complained that I shouldn't have done that. Because he says it seems like I'm bragging and making them feel envious. =( But it's not like that... I don't know... On one hand, quite true, it may seem like I'm bragging and showing off and all... But I honestly don't mean it that way! I hope they know that... Sigh... Me and my big mouth sometime... -_- I only meant to update that I've found a job, that I'm doing well now... =(

Anyway, gotta head off to bed soon! Can't be late tomorrow! I so can't wait to start work... 2 weeks of rotting at home is enough to drive me crazy! The interviewers (or rather my new bosses) were like asking how come I don't want to take a longer break, go for holiday or something after working for so long. -_- Haha... Sure, a break is fine, but 2 weeks of doing nothing? And it's not as if other people are free to meet up with me, go out, etc... And I NEED to do something or my brain will rust. LOL. I was planning to take some short courses if I am still unable to find a job. =p

Ok, I'll blog more tomorrow since hubby is working late shift so poor me gotta learn to be independent and go home by myself. =p

Update Again!

2009-10-12T08:30:00.000-07:00

Hmmm... Where should I start?

Ok, first off, found a job! =) Am so relieved... Hehe... Looking forward to working again! No, seriously. Haha... I was bored out of my wits! Will talk more about this tomorrow or something.

Secondly, finally can complete the HDB forms for our flat! =D

Thirdly, I'm missing my girls from my ex-company. You know who you are eh. Sigh. =( I missed those days of disturbing them, giggling and gossiping, going out for meals. I'm gonna arrange an outing soon, so YOU better turn up!

Lastly, am super sick. -_- Haven't been this sick for a long time! Having a super runny nose (tempted to just shove some tissues up my nose and leave it there honestly!) and an extremely bad cough (been hacking away like crazy that I think I'm going to cough my lungs out). It's so awful I think I'll sleep early for once. Hopefully the cough won't keep me awake. -_- Been coughing until I teared. Sigh.

Anyway, oh my god, where has time flown? Soon it'll be end of the month and 2 months later, HELLO to Hong Kong! =D I so can't wait! It seems like just yesterday that I booked the air tickets. LOL. Oh no, no time to lose weight until it's time to go HK. Haha.

Ok, should be heading to bed soon. I can feel the room spinning and a major headache is drumming itself into my head. -_-

Mixed Emotions...

2009-10-04T11:52:00.001-07:00

Worried, because haven't found a job yet... -_- Maybe I should lower my expectations? Haha... =p

Sad, because am missing Bui and Lyna! =( Honestly, it's just not the same without you... Especially Lyna... I think even hubby thinks I love you more than him... Haha!

Happy, because I'm out of the hell-hole... =) Really, I don't regret my decision to leave. And my temper is so much better now. Even hubby notices I'm not that bad-tempered as compared to a few months back. Not to mention my maniac moments (yeah, the crying, the quarrels with him over nothing, the suicidal thought) have disappeared. LOL.

Frustrated, because I don't want to do customary wedding and lunch/dinner but I can't say no to our parents... Can I? =p Just thinking of needing to prepare all those things for the customary is stressing me out! -_- Haha, maybe I'm just terrified also of wearing a wedding dress. *jiggles all her fats*

Excited, because December is drawing nearer and it'll be time for my 'honeymoon' with hubby! Whoopee! ^_^ Can go see his da jie's lil girl! I adore her to bits! =D And I'm soooo gonna video our second overseas trip! Haven't been to Hong Kong for so long... Lots of memories...

Relieved, because we've found our lovenest, just next to his friend's house! LOL! =x Thanks ZX and CX! Though can only move in mid next year I suppose. Hubby's so excited that he's already designing our house. Haha. I guess I'm not as excited because it's still so far away and I don't really see the point of looking at what to buy for the house. New products will surface and I'll most probably want the latest stuff! LOL! =x I mean, see now, what's the point? Not as if I can buy now, stock at my place or his first. -_-

Glad, because hubby got a new job and it's something that he enjoys! Nothing beats getting a job that you've passion for. =) Congrats my dear hubby!

Thankful, because of hubby's support in my decision to quit before securing another job. =) Especially when I don't think I was that supportive when the same thing happened the other way round. =p

Upset, because one of my poor hammie got injured by the ferocious mother hamster. She's a major nutcase! -_- This is the second time she bullied the male hamsters and wounded them! Sheesh!

Relaxed, because went back to his hometown and had so much fun playing with little Juicy! =p She's absolutely adorable. But temperamental! And extremely smart and active. I've got scraped knees from crawling after her for so long. -_- Not to mention so tiring trying to get her to stop crying!

So many emotions, just one me. It's a wonder I can keep myself together. LOL. =p Tomorrow (or rather, later) going for an interview in the morning and then it's off for a date with hubby! He's off work tomorrow... Hehehe... =)

What's in your name?

2009-09-22T03:04:00.001-07:00

Took this test today for myself and hubby. Quite interesting and accurate from what I'm skimmed so far... =D

"What's the hidden meaning of your name?"

Mine:

You Are Seductive and Ruthless

You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong. You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know. You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.

You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life. You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you. At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself.

You are influential and persuasive. You tend to have a lot of power over people. Generally, you use your powers for good. You excel at solving other people's problems. Occasionally, you do get a little selfish and persuade people to do things that are only in your interest.

You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out. Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia. Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are deeply philosophical and thoughtful. You tend to analyze every aspect of your life. You are intuitive, brilliant, and quite introverted. You value your time alone. Often times, you are grumpy with other people. You don't appreciate them trying to interfere in your affairs.

You are incredibly sexy and sensual. You have a naughty vibe that no one can ignore. You have an unquenchable desire. And you are unrestrained in your passions. You have a tendency to be unfaithful. Whether you fight it or give in to it is up to you.

You are a seeker. You often find yourself restless - and you have a lot of questions about life. You tend to travel often, to fairly random locations. You're most comfortable when you're far away from home. You are quite passionate and easily tempted. Your impulses sometimes get you into trouble.

Hubby's:

You Are Powerful and Determined

You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated. You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want. You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way!

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily. You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind. A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable.

You are a very lucky person. Things just always seem to go your way. And because you're so lucky, you don't really have a lot of worries. You just hope for the best in life. You're sometimes a little guilty of being greedy. Spread your luck around a little to people who need it.

Randomness

2009-09-22T02:38:00.000-07:00

Had my exit interview from my current company. My last day will be officially on 30 September 09. Haven't secured a new job yet... So you can only imagine how BADLY I want to leave here.

It's time to move on. I'll miss my beloved colleagues like Bui and Lyna and Sharon. But I won't miss anything else here.

Anyway, I'm still actively looking for a job. But Lyna is right, nowadays the jobs available are for skilled workers. Even hubby who half-heartedly looked for job, has found a new job! I'm thrilled for him. =) It pays like S$400 more, and it's a job he likes, so it's a win-win situation! He sounds really enthusiastic about what this new job can offer, so I'm really happy for him. =) Hope this time the new boss will be better.

Now that hubby's career is settled so far, outstanding issues will be a new job for me, buying a house of our own, and preparing for my year-end trip. =) Once all these done, I'm a happy girl! =p My goals are simple. Heh.

Oh yes, OTT, yesterday went KTV with Lyna and Sharon. I tell you, it was a riot! =D We had SOOOO much laughter there. Made a fool of ourselves and shocking the poor waiter, screached to Aerosmith's "I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing" (which I made a voice recording and I laughed every single time when I replayed it at least 10 times, LOL!), danced to "My Humps" by Black Eyed Peas (ok, that's me, showing Lyna my wonderfully big butt) and my poor cheese fries got squashed by Lyna's butt. Haven't had such a good laugh for the longest time! Such that I was missing Lyna already when we went home. =( Can we go again soon??!!

Oh, and another random talk: I want LG Cookie! I was so tempted to buy the LG Cookie at Singtel when I visited ION Orchard! It was S$300 without contract. I think it's probably because they are discontinuing this model. =( I like it because it's fully touch-screen and it uses a stylus, which means I can poke poke the phone with my nails! I can't use Arena, IPhone, because it's not THAT touch-sensitive and I have super fat and clumsy fingers. -_- And my phone is quite cranky these days. It shuts off by itself, smses doesn't come through (need to switch off and switch on), it's laggy as hell, and worst is hubby's number doesn't reflect his name nor picture nor his ringtone! =( So really wanted a new phone. But then thinking again, quite a waste of money since it's still working, and not as if I REALLY need a new phone now. Haiz. Quite torn between buying and not buying. Oh well, just wait for the new Sony Ericsson phone end of the month. Or for better deals.

To Go or Not to Go, That is the Question

2009-08-25T02:06:00.001-07:00

Yup. Actually I've tendered and gave one month notice already, but because of the 'counselling' by my 2 bosses, plus the fact that I haven't found a job, I decided to take back my resignation. So I'm still stuck here. But should still be leaving end September.

Ivory asked me why I want to leave. Various reasons. She should know I long ago want to leave. But why now? Because now I really do not feel the motivation to continue working. Honestly, that's the best answer already. I'm rude to the students, I've no patience with them, I'm not who I used to be when I first started here. I don't like this change, and it just means my passion is not here anymore. My heart is not in the work, is not with the students anymore. How to continue working here? Work until my attitude pisses someone off and I get fired?

Other reasons of course is the salary, benefits, etc and plus the fact that my dad and bro keep nagging to change job, find government job, etc. *shrugs* Ah well. A change in environment is good. Because I've been here so long already; 4 years I think, and I don't think I've learnt much. It's time to move out of my comfort zone and do something new, face new challenges, meet new people. Sometimes I feel I'm taking granted of the comfort zone that I have here. Because I've known some of the people for so long, I do do my work, I work ok with the people here. So not much problems I face like office politics, etc. But being stagnant here isn't good either. I find that I don't really know much about other things. I only know about my current jobscope. I feel like I need to go and 'see the world'.

I honestly do feel bad leaving Ivory here with all the other problems with students. And I can't bear to leave her and Philyna. They mean alot to me, more than they know. But I do have to leave. I cannot take it much longer. For the past 2 or 3 months, I've been complaining DAILY to my hubby. I feel so angry and all the other negative emotions at the end of each working day. I throw tantrums at him, I nag at him, I rant to him. I think he's also sick of all these. But I can't stop myself. Keeping them bottled inside just makes me feel even worse and if no other outlets to release the tension, I just flare up at him for every little matter that he's suffering just as much as I do. I feel so bad, but I can't stop myself really.

So to go or not to go? If I don't go, I'll probably go crazy sooner or later. And I'll probably get fired for my attitude towards the students. If I go, I feel bad for deserting Ivory and Philyna. I don't know lah. Hopefully I find a job soon. It will help me make my decision...

My Hamster Just Gave Birth!

2009-08-04T00:35:00.000-07:00

I can only say this: "OMGOMGOMFG!"

I was so stunned when hubby told me she had just given birth! Because I didn't notice anything different when I fed them in the morning before work!

Snuck in a peek on the babies, and awwww... They are just so cute and gross at the same time! Wriggling, little hairless, reddish things... LOL! I can't wait to see them grow out their fur! ^_^

Managed to count them (because they were partially hidden by the cotton wool that I had put in the cage originally), and there are 8 of them! I think it's just so interesting to see the mother hamster pick them up with her teeth back into the house. They kept dropping out of the house, because she's so fat, she inevitably will drag some babies out of the house when she climbs out of the tiny house-hole.

Well, this is the highlight of this week! =) I keep sneaking out to take a look at them whenever I'm home. Sigh.

Now I just pray hard that they'll grow up soon! And be safe... >_<

Update~

2009-06-27T11:43:00.001-07:00

Work:

Getting busy and stressed as hell. I can't wait for end of July where I can FINALLY relax! -_- So many things to do, to handle, to take note... Sigh... I don't envy Ivory.

Life:

Hmmm, well, waiting to buy our own 'love nest'. Hoping that we can get the flat from the HDB half-yearly sale! Please pray for us! >_< When that is settled, well, it's a load off my mind. And we can start planning the renovation and hopefully be able to move in by end of the year!

Had a fight with sis. Shan't elaborate, only am sorry for slapping her, which was quite uncalled for no matter what. Especially since I don't condone violence. Sigh. But I'm still not gonna forgive her for the things she said. Mess with me, fine. Mess with hubby, sorry, I will NEVER tolerate. End of story.

His friend gave us 2 new baby hamsters! UBER cuteness lah! =D Yeah, my last hammie died. Sigh. So I told his friend, and he said he'll give us two hamsters. But then one male, one female. -_- Just worried when there are babies! I'll just go frantic with worry. -_- But they are quite tame surprisingly. The male one is such a scaredy-cat. LOL. Hum-ji one. Hahaha... Started shivering when hubby carried it. =p The female one super duper small lor! So worried I'll accidentally crush her. -_- Interestingly they don't play with the wheel. Hubby says they are still small and not used to their new home. =p Love them to bits. Still don't know what to call them though. So far came up with Kachang and Putih. LOL. Because before that was eating kachang putih, and just nice, the male one is white in colour, the female is yellowish, orangey. =p

Went to his friend's pub with 2 of his friends. Long time haven't been clubbing. LOL. Feel so old lah. Anyway was abit miffed when one of the guy that STARED at my chest when he walked past me. LIKE HELLO?! It's not as if I was wearing anything revealing as what I would wear to clubbing lah! -_- And such blatant staring?! CB lor. Hubby still can joke if I had worn another top, he would have nose-bleed. -_- What the hell...

That's all for now. Crossing my fingers that we get our flat soon! =(

Back from Bangkok

2009-05-31T10:03:00.001-07:00

Am missing my 3 Thai girlfriends badly from King's Garden pub near Patpong... =(

Kwan, the 19-year-old waitress who is super duper cute. Her reactions is really typical of a 'xiao meimei' but not those act cute kind. The way she smiles and her dramatic gestures really is so endearing and cute! Hubby says I like her so much because her face is the 'fleshy' kind, very nice to pinch type. =p I especially adore the way she scratched her head when hubby did some of those card/coin tricks, the way she kept practising the card tricks my hubby taught her, the way she proudly 'thanked' everyone for watching her successful card trick, the way she beamed (my hubby says her smile is a 'squarish' kind of smile, very cute). She's just adorable.

Cookie, one of the girls at the pub, is sweet looking, and is good on the eyes. =) Not your typical "chio" kind, but it's those girl-next-door kind. Every night that we're there, she'd come find me, give me a hug at the waist and touch my upper arm. -_- I joked to hubby that she's taking advantage of me. LOL! She's very shy and doesn't talk much, except to me. But then she likes to ask me to play "Connect 4" with her. -_- Which I lose every single time. Sigh. Until the next night when I'm there, I refused to play with her. =x Hubby says she likes to play with me because I'm stupid. -_- She ended up being our friend's date during our last night there. Hehe... All thanks to me lah! I 'sacrificed' my body to lure her into our group and matchmake them! =x

Last but not least is Aou. How do I say, she reminds me so much of Philyna and more. =) The first few nights that we saw her, she seems very arrogant, rarely smiling and 'untouchable'. But on the last night, because we were showing Cookie a few antics (like ear-wriggling, eyebrow raised up and down etc), she asked Aou over to show us the "pupils in the middle" antic. Oh my god, that made us all laugh like mad. And from there, there's no stopping all of us. Her reactions, are all so dramatic, totally opposite from her usual persona. She's not afraid of looking so unglam, so ugly, etc. There's nothing that she won't do seriously. =p The way she threw a tantrum when her colleagues laughed at the fat bird that she folded for me, the way she glared and sulked, the way she just roared in laughter whenever she failed to do some of the tricks that we showed them (or rather, hubby, who showed them some card and coin tricks), the way she went to disturb our friend, her facial expressions, really drama-mama. =)

There's so much I want to say about Aou, so much I want to put in words what I love about her, so much I want to describe the time spent with her and the other girls. But no words can describe this experience, no words can explain how much fun we've all had. I guess I can only keep Aou in my heart, remembering her and our encounter. And of course the other girls. =)

I miss them oh so much. =( Pity that we didn't meet Aou earlier. We would have had so much more fun.

I'll blog more about my Bangkok trip next time. Waiting for hubby's photos. Now I'll just go and cry. =(

Busy Day...

2009-05-23T11:07:00.001-07:00

Had so many things to do today! Not enough sleep... -_- Wanted to sleep more since it's (a) a Saturday! No work! and (b) didn't sleep enough the past few nights. (Last night had a durian supper plus midnight show at Causeway Point. Night at the Museum 2!) But well, had a busy day lined up, and we needed to go to trim our hair at the salon at 12nn.

So off we went, trimmed our hair and headed off to his friend's bike shop. Had our lunch near there, and went to the Mustafa Warehouse sale. Bought a camcorder as it was pretty cheap! Only S$355! Includes a 4GB SD card, sling casing and extra battery! Actually the free gifts are supposed to be just a small casing (pouch) and a SD card (no extra battery). But the guy probably mistook the Starter Kit for the casing, so he gave us the Starter Kit instead! =D So yeah, very good deal! ^_^ It'll be my baby! Though when will I finally get my own digicam? -_-

Then it looked like it was going to rain soon, so we headed off to Golden Mile Complex to change our currency to Thai Baht and rushed off to his sister's place as we're supposed to have dinner there. =) But they were not back home yet, so we went to Punggol Plaza to rot. =p

Finally we went over to his sister's place where we had steamboat dinner with his sis and bro-in-law and cousins. Very nice gathering, lots of gossips. LOL! =p I do enjoy such gatherings, though I don't really talk much. Hahaha... =x Maybe just not used to it I suppose! Watched TV, played Ban Luck, and went off to meet William for a short meeting before we meet again to go to Bangkok!

Oh no, speaking of which, I still haven't pack my luggage! Wahahahaha... Guess will have to wait till tomorrow... =x

Bangkok, here I come! =D

One More Week...

2009-05-17T19:41:00.001-07:00

... and I'm off to Bangkok! ^_^

But can't help worrying about work. Sigh... This week gonna be really busy trying to ensure that everything is ok for when I go on leave! Honestly I'd hate it if something goes wrong when I'm not here, despite what others may think. I'd just feel real bad. =(

But well, I still can't help feeling excited about this trip and I hope we'll really enjoy ourselves there rather than fight and argue! Must learn to control my temper! Sigh...

Nothing much these few weeks. Just busy and stressed at work I suppose. Alot of things are beyond my control, and I don't like that. =( Not when I do my best and I can't get the results I want. It's so frustrating.

I probably need a new job. Sigh...

This holiday came just at the right timing. I just can't wait to relax and not have to answer phonecalls or emails. One whole week all to myself and hubby. =) Just pampering ourselves. *bliss*

I love my hubby! Even though he SO annoys me at times! Grrrr... Yeah, all the 'healthy' talk, 'no money', etc just irritates me. I'm just not someone anyone can nag! I've had enough of that at home!

And speaking of home, I just can't wait to get our own flat and move out asap. Can't live with her anymore. At least when I move out, I'm not reliant on her for anything, so I don't have to put up with her. I'll only miss my daddy and siblings. I'll always be daddy's little girl. =( Only wish our relationship was as tight as it was when I was a lil kid. Sigh. So many things to say to daddy, just don't know how to. We're just not the sort to be open with our feelings. Except anger. LOL.

Makeover on Sunday

2009-04-20T10:41:00.000-07:00

Had a makeover on Sunday. Haha, not exactly. Maybe should call it Pampering Myself. =p

Won 2 free facial sessions for hubby and myself at this spa centre, because we were the first 150 persons to add it as a Fan on Facebook. So I made appointment for Sunday, and we headed down to the City Hall outlet.

Looks quite nice and cozy, and we had to fill up our particulars etc before starting the session. During the session, the beautician was quite nice and told me all the things she was doing for me. Quite a relaxing time there. Haha...

After that, met hubby at the reception area for our tea and the lady came over to sell us their packages. Honestly, it's not THAT expensive, and if I had abit of spare moolah, I would sign up for their package, because I do like having facial. But then again, the lady's attitude kind of suck. I didn't like her snide comments of "Wah, thought you two discussing there so long, talk about what big business." And then when she realized that we're not pushovers, she just ignored us when we left the centre. Quite lousy attitude right? If she had still been nice and all, I might have considered signing for the package next time.

When we reached the carpark after we left, hubby looked at his face and was horrified to see some residue in his nostrils! LOL! He was quite grossed out with it. =p Apparently his beautician didn't clean his face properly. Also, he commented that his beautician was sniffling and to me I think that's gross. If you're sick, you shouldn't be doing facial for others. I mean come on, I don't think I want to hear your sniffling and how your mucus is like stuck in your nose. Geez! I'm there to enjoy my facial, not hear some mucus symphony.

Furthermore, it's quite interesting to hear that his beautician didn't do some light massaging, cleaning his neck, shoulders, applying some body cream from neck to shoulders to arms and hands. (Which mine did =p) So he was abit disappointed with the service, at how the standard is different. Oh well, they are aiming for better service for girls, since girls are more likely to sign up for their package, and hence the need to impress us. =p But then again, if 2 persons go together, same treatment should be done for both so that at least they know the service is there, that it will be standard for all treatments done there.

Oh well, no more second trip there. But I'm tempted to source for other reliable companies for facials. Quite like doing facials. Haha... Maybe will get hubby to go also. But need to check that the products used are reliable. For this one, I'm shocked that they used some kind of acid for their "Avro Peel" facial. Supposedly for removing dead skin. Hmmmm... I don't know, I just don't like the word acid. Imagine if you do it like, once a month, I think within a year, my face will just rot away lah. -_- Furthermore I think it's not for me, because at the end of the day, when I look at my face, I have some red patches, where I think it's some kind of skin irritation. Geez. After using Artistry products, I'm just not keen on any other products for my face. Because their products is really not bad. =)

Anyway, after that headed for the saloon for my hair cut. Last minute decided to perm my hair since it wasn't that expensive. But then, didn't like how my hair turned out. It's not that the service isn't good. It's just my hair that's stubborn. Hopefully after a few more washes, the curls will look nicer. Hmmm...

Then went to visit his mum at his cousin's place, since she was helping his cousin with her post-pregnancy confinement. The baby was so cute lah! =p He's so long, should be quite tall next time! And he's such a quiet baby, seems easy to handle. LOL... I can't stand crying babies. They freak me out too much. I like babies and kids, but I don't know if I had a baby, I'll feel the same way too. LOL. The cryings annoy me, or rather scare me. At least with other people's babies/kids, if they start crying, I'll just hand them back and leave. =p I wouldn't know how to deal with mine. -_-

Anyway, today woke up with a headache and jaw pain. Couldn't chew properly, and if I attempt to chew properly by clenching my teeth, my jaw ached like mad. Hubby thought it was mumps, but it doesn't seem swollen on the outside, but inside was definitely swollen, because I couldn't chew properly on the right side. So went to see a doc, and he confirmed it was some infection or something. Not enough water. So he just told me to take some antibiotics and painkillers. Sigh. Not more medicine again. And of course hubby started nagging me about my drinking habits. -_-

Nothing more, just going to sleep early tonight because my jaw still hurts. =(

Virgin Trip To Bangkok

2009-04-15T10:07:00.000-07:00

Hooray! My FIRST trip to Bangkok! Oh, did I mention also my first time arranging an overseas trip?! Booking airtickets, booking accommodation, etc. Oh my goodness, I'm so worried that I'll screw things up. -_- Knowing what a blur sotong I am...

Anyhow, have booked the airtickets today, and just finished booking the accommodation. Will be going with his friend who will meet his girl friend there. =) Company's good! At least we won't be so lost there. -_- I can so imagine both of us looking so freaking lost there and losing our tempers along the way. LOL. Because I'll be highly impatient, and he doesn't know what's going on.

So yeah, I so can't wait for the trip! Wait for loads of pics! Since I'm DEFINITELY gonna take photos of the super duper grand hotel that we're staying for the last 2 nights! And of course the hostel, looks cute lah! =D Oh oh, and not to mention all the shopping! LOL... ^_^

The Lazy One PMS-ing

2009-04-13T01:10:00.001-07:00

I hate PMS-ing. Bloated, no appetite, cramps, lethargy. I can't believe I threw a good half packet of chicken rice away! And from my favourite stall nonetheless. Geez. Not to mention the ULTRA bad-temperedness. Poor him of course suffered the brunt of it. -_- Well, doesn't help that he's not sensitive enough to know the 'commandment': "Thou Shalt Not Provoke a PMS-ing Woman". Hmmphh.

Anyway, before I go on about what brought about this post, I've GOOD NEWS! (No, I'm NOT pregnant duh -_- Thank God!) Hubby won a 3D2N stay at a 5-star hotel in Bangkok! Woohoo! =D It's called Dusit Thani hotel and if you go surf its website, oh my god, the Club benefits (included in the package) is awesome. We're gonna live like freaking King and Queen! LOL...

Yeah yeah, I know I sound like I've never seen the world. =p But I've NEVER stayed at a 5-star hotel with such wonderful treatment before! Well, not that I can remember... And it's in Bangkok, so it's a wonderful excuse to go for a Bangkok trip! Haha... Yeap, yours truly has NEVER been to Bangkok. -_- Even Ivory has gone there at least 2 times! *SULKS*

Anyhow, we collected the voucher and at night when I MSN-ed daddy, here's the conversation (as far as I can remember) which I think is a riot, the way daddy speaks. LOL.

Me: Daddy! We won a 3D2N stay at Bangkok! So we going there next month!
Daddy: Make sure no gimmick.
Me: Aiyah, no gimmick one, it's a prize from some voting contest that he joined...
Daddy: Ok, we'll be back on Friday night. We discuss it then.

So duhhhhh right? Hahahaha... But that's my daddy for you! =p

Anyway, was having a fever and then the next day kena stupid 'auntie visit'. I SUPER DUPER hate it. And then on Sunday, I happily wanna watch "The Devil Wears Prada", and mummy had to nag and nag and complain and complain (the usual about the messy room, she was talking to my sis, but I know she also partly meant it for my ears too, just that she doesn't really tell me off these days) while walking to and fro infront of the TV! Like, HELLO, I'M WATCHING THE BLARDY TV! So fine, I tried to control my temper because I so want to finish watching the show. AND THEN SOMEONE HAD TO ANNOY ME BY ASKING ME TO HELP CLEAN UP MY ROOM AFTER THE SHOW! WHO ELSE?!

If there's one thing I hate in the world, it's being told to clean up my room. Or anything for the matter. Yeah, I'm a lazy bitch. But it's so messy I don't even know where to start! And when I start cleaning up, I don't like to do it halfway and I SO know I'll sweat buckets clearing my room. No joke lor. And that's why I DON'T WANT TO CLEAN UP MY ROOM TODAY.

So yeah, the volcano erupt and I just stormed off to my room and started cleaning up AKA throwing things away. Then HE got mad and stormed off and went home. AND I MISSED THE FREAKING SHOW! *SULKS*

And yeah, I'm still feeling really bitchy today. I'm gonna bite his head off if he dares annoy me again tonight.

I'M GOING TO HONG KONG!!!!!!!

2009-04-01T11:12:00.001-07:00

This afternoon my colleague told me about this promotion by Jetstar. She got the information from her sister, and the both of them are just so into travelling! They always know where to look for good deals and all. =p I wish I was as resourceful as them!

Anyhow she was saying how the Hong Kong flights are so cheap now and she showed me the rate. I was quite excited at the prospect of going to Hong Kong, since I can go there and see his niece! Of course not to mention re-visiting Hong Kong. =) So I called hubby who didn't seem too interested, but I think enthusiasm is really catching, so he ended up giving in to my whims. =p

So I went ahead to book and managed to get us both return air tickets to Hong Kong for S$462! =D (S$119 to Hong Kong and S$15 back to Singapore per person before taxes and all!) Such a steal in my opinion! I'm quite particular about comfort, so even a trip to KL, I'll want one of the better coaches, so ended up the last time we went to KL, we spent at least S$200 on coach for both of us. =x So to me, paying S$500 for flights to Hong Kong is nothing. Haha... It may not be business class, but the journey isn't that long either, so it's ok!

Furthermore we can save on accommodation since we will be bunking in at his eldest sis's place. I did give some thought about overseas trip, since we're supposed to save up for renovation for our new flat (which we are still looking for) and other expenses. But well, I figured if I spend less on cab fares, on my extravagant spending, etc, I should be able to save at least a hundred or two each month from now until we leave for our holiday. =)

So now tickets are booked, I'm so looking forward to the Hong Kong trip! I haven't been overseas for SO LONG. And not once with him! (Hey, Malaysia not counted, and the furthest we went is to Kuala Lumpur. -_-) I've already forgotten what it is like to sit in an aeroplane! LOL... And it's one of the longest REAL holiday that we'll be taking together, so to me, this is really a big deal and I'm just SO SO excited! =) He did promise to bring me to Hong Kong in 2010, but knowing him, he'll procrastinate and not do any planning towards the said trip unless I take things into my own hands. -_- He'll consider this and that, complain how we cannot afford it, blah blah blah. But well, I think I deserve this trip! =p

Anyway it's still such a long way to go before we actually embark on our trip! We're leaving on 29 Dec 09, coming back on 9 Jan 10. =D Super shiok right? ^_^ Luckily his sister stays in Hong Kong and we can save on accommodation, otherwise this trip to Hong Kong may not be possible. Especially not with such a long stay! The hotel fees would have killed both of us! Haha... We'll probably have to eat maggi mee for the next few months to save enough money! And probably not be able to visit some of the attractions there too. -_-

Alrighty! Start saving! Stop eating at restaurants so frequently! Stop shopping! Stop taking cabs! Stop snacking! Haha... Must save as much money as I can to spend on stuff there! I'm lemming for cutesy stuff to bring back! I won't be surprised if I come back with a huge teddy bear or soft toy. LOL. =x Though he'll probably be a wet blanket about it. -_- Ah well... =p

Finally It's Over...

2009-03-29T22:06:00.001-07:00

No need for any further contact with the person anymore. Finally a load, a burden off my back. Now to just push away all the memories, good and bad.

Just feeling such immense relief. =) Though feeling some sadness for the friends that I've lost too. =(

House-Hunting

2009-02-25T23:12:00.001-08:00

Super vexed now. I hate growing up. I hate making adult decisions.

Because I quite like the 3-room flat that me and hubby saw, but it's S$238K valuation price, and the owner is hoping for S$20K COV. But hubby's point of view is that it's too expensive especially with regards to the COV. The valuation for 3-room flats around the same area is maximum S$220K. Hence the higher valuation of this flat is due to the renovation that was done 7 years ago. Which is why hubby refused to pay so much COV.

But I like it because it's renovated already, and can move in when all procedures have been settled, and don't need the hassle of anymore renovation. Furthermore it's just behind my family's condo's backgate. And within 2 min walk, there are bus stop with more buses, coffeeshops. Bukit Panjang Plaza is only 5 min walk away. Besides, he can park his bike and car if he gets one eventually at the condo and walk home.

But he prefers the 4-room flat which is less accessible and slightly further from my family's house. There are no coffeeshops within walking distance. Plaza is even further. I haven't seen the house for myself, but seems like renovation needs to be done. Which of course, is better, since we can renovate to suit our taste. But it seems like such a hassle. You'll need time to go and decide what kind of renovation, need to crack brains YET again.

On one hand I do understand where he's coming from. I know he doesn't want to be SO near to my family's place because mom will surely pop over too often. And furthermore he wouldn't want my parents to pay for the COV for us which they have offered to. I also understand he likes the 4-room one, because it's quieter there, the air is better there as there are more trees there. And we can do our own renovation and it's better value for money since it's almost half a house more than the 3-room flat.

On the other hand, I like the familiarity that the 3-room flat presents. That it's so near my house and I don't have to change my routes to work, etc. I can go down to dapao food home, I can walk to Plaza if I want, I can walk to 163 coffeeshop if I want. I can walk home to visit my sis. And if friends want to come visit, it's easier for them too because it's more convenient and easier to direct them as most of them will be taking the public transport.

I don't know lah. I think so much until I so want to cry because I don't know what to decide.

Sad... =(

2008-12-09T03:33:00.001-08:00

Feeling really sad, because while me and hubby were off at his hometown, my 2 hammies apparently got into a fight... My Ben Dan went to bite a chunk off his Huai Dan's head... *cries* Everytime I see his bald patch I cry... =( Feel so upset and hurting, because it must have hurt alot and poor Huai Dan must have been tormented... I know my Ben Dan has been bullying his Huai Dan these few weeks, but I thought it was nothing, so didn't separate them... Sigh...

So angry with naughty Ben Dan... Shall rename him as Wang Ba Dan liao... Hubby so angry with my Ben Dan that he threaten to feed him to the stray cats downstairs... *cries* Now I just wanna go home and sayang poor Huai Dan and make him as comfortable as possible... =(

I don't dare to wash poor Huai Dan, because of his wound... So I ended up washing the cage while hubby washed him... Saw spots of blood and I just cried lah... Cried myself to sleep also... Poor lil fella... =( Then hubby went to apply yellow lotion on his wound... -_- And now my Ben Dan is stuck in the Tupperware, because didn't have time to buy new cage for him...

I WANNA CRY AGAIN LAH!!!!! *BAWLS*

I HATE YOU.

2008-09-09T22:13:00.001-07:00

I actually wrote a long entry, but I decided I'll just post it in my personal blog instead.

But I still want to rant here. And yell to the whole world that "I FUCKING HATE YOU V".

You know who you are. And I shan't comment further here.

I can only say just hearing your voice makes me wanna hurl.

And yeah, you're not the only one facing 'FAMILY ISSUES'. I am also facing FUCKING family issues. So what's the big fuck about yours?!

Yuppers. I'm FUCKING PISSED. And whoever dares tell me not to use such language, you can FUCK OFF already, because this is my FUCKING blog, and I can FUCKING write what I want.

Girls...

2008-03-06T22:08:00.001-08:00

Maybe because I'm not that kind of girl, but I don't understand why some girls can be so cheap go message other guys to add them in Facebook. Especially when the profile clearly states he's MARRIED. Which means, HANDS OFF MY PROPERTY WOMAN! Grrr... I do trust my hubby won't do anything YET. But whether he'll still be as sure when the girl keeps pestering or messaging him, etc, that's another matter.

I simply detest sluts like these type of girls. Call me possessive, I don't care.

I just don't like other girls tempting my hubby. Period. Go get your own. Cheap bitch.

PMS Sucks...

2008-03-06T02:15:00.001-08:00

I hate PMS-ing and treating him like shit. I know I shouldn't, but when I'm PMS-ing a few days before the stupid thing, I get really irrational, irritable, insecure (extreme), etc. I don't mean to give myself excuses for treating him so badly, but well, I'm just so glad he's so tolerant, despite getting fed up with me. And I can't help but cry when he says he will not have any regrets marrying me. =(

I just hope he'll still be like this. That we can go back to our dating days. When I wasn't so insecure, when I wasn't so annoying. Sometimes I really hate the person I've become. I need my confidence back. =|

Regrets...

2008-03-03T01:24:00.001-08:00

Not me, just my ex, who contacted me during the weekend and yeah, said how sorry he was, blah blah blah.

Fool me once, I'm naive; fool me twice, I'm stupid.

How appropriate this song is...

One Republic Ft. Timbaland - Apologize

I'm holding on your rope,

Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearin what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothin new
I loved you with a fire red-
Now it's turning blue, and you say...
"Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

Bridge (guitar/piano)

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
It's too late to apologize, yeah
I said it's too late to apologize, yeah-
I'm holdin on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground...

Sian Week...

2008-03-02T05:31:00.001-08:00

This week has been horrendous. What with the Career Fair, the textbook collection, etc. I can't wait to claim my compensated leave and have some ME time. I want to go shopping!

So many movies I wanna watch also! Where will I find the time and money to watch ALL of them?!

1) The Leap Years

2) P.S I Love You

3) Kungfu Dunk

4) Death Note: L Change The World

5) Away From Her

6) Water Horse

7) Sky of Love

Should be getting my new phone at the I.T. Fair instead! Because worry that later got roadshow there and it's cheaper. Wah, I'd feel blardy pissed if I get it now and find that if I had bought it at the roadshow I would have saved more money! -_-

So anyway yeah, still using the cuckoo phone. =p

Yipee~!

2008-02-25T01:36:00.001-08:00

Heehee, so excited! I'm FINALLY going to get a new handphone! =x Courtesy of my hubby! ^_^ Not cheap also lor! Sigh... But I REALLY REALLY like that phone, despite the many problems posted by users in those forums. =( My phone is more expensive that his by almost 300 bucks! Yah, he's getting a new phone too, because his China phone is really the pits! Interesting and quite alike SE W960i, but lots of firmware problems I think!

Before anyone thinks we've struck lottery, it's not that ok. Just that he finally got his insurance compensation, so we have some spare money to pamper ourselves for once! He's considered really thrifty liao, because before the money came in, he had so many things he wanted to get, like new phone, laptop, digital camera. But now he says he only getting the phones for us, the rest save up. -_- Think if I were him, I couldn't care less and start buying all the stuff I've always wanted but don't have the finances to get. =x That's why I told him the money don't put in my account. I'll just spend them. =x

Anyway I can hardly wait lah! ! But can only wait until Sunday then can get! Hopefully can get it on the spot! -_- Gosh, I need to start shopping for accessories for my new phone, like pouch, screen protector, etc. Hahaha. =p My current phone is like so 'koyak' liao, bought in 2006! First phone I bought with my own pay. Lol. So I don't bear to trade-in when I'm buying the new phone. =p May have saved him 100 bucks, but I don't care, it has so many memories lah! Not to mention it's so hardy, with me being so careless, throwing it into my bag, having it fall out of my jacket onto the road and it falling apart, etc, it's still in working condition! =p Really like my phone, but time for a change!

Another thing is I can't wait for this week to be over. Including Saturday! I'm just SOOO tired. I really want to go for a holiday. =( As in a REAL holiday, not just going to KL or his hometown for like wedding, or etc.

I want to be positive, and keep smiling but it's so trying...

Kids say the darnedest things...

2008-02-22T03:53:00.001-08:00

So cute that Matthew (my boss's son).

Boss: ... Is it raining?
Matthew: No, it's Matthew!

-_-||| *speechless*

*bursts out laughing*

I think it's so cute lah... =p

Sick...

2008-02-21T00:35:00.001-08:00

Feel sick, but can't go on leave nor take MC. Sian. Throat hurts like mad, I feel like I'm burning up (even he complains why I'm so hot when he cuddled me to sleep last night).

I don't want to work. I just want to have some ME time. Away from here, away from everyone. Except my hubby that is. LOL.

Sleepy, sleepy, sleepy...

Angry...

2008-02-12T19:11:00.001-08:00

Damn pissed off with mum lah.

Story is, me and him came back to Singapore late Monday night. And I wanted to go back to my house to sleep because I miss my room! =p So we just came back to my place without bringing any Mandarin oranges since we thought it was late already, and by the time we wake up nobody will be home, and we also cannot 'bai nian' properly. Besides, it feels like CNY is over liao lor. -_-

Then morning mum came and kpkb about us not bringing Mandarin oranges. I explained she still sulk and kpkb somemore. Fine. So at night he after work went home to get the damned oranges and came over with angpow for my mum since she also asked me to give some money to his mum. And he also apologized and explained to my parents.

And then she complained to sis that why only give one angpow. And then she came and "talked" to him, nagging him about our traditions, that must give 2 angpows, blah blah blah. What really irks me is the way she puts it. What the hell do you mean by "if your parents never teach you what to do, then I teach you what you should have done"?

Hey, are you trying to insinuate that his parents didn't bring him up properly? Never teach him manners? At least his parents never talk to me like that ok!

For Chrissake, it's not as if I've done this before. Nor him for that matter. We both don't give a damn about such lame traditions. It's the thought that counts anyway! Why do you need to be so uptight over it? You wanna think that people only give parents one angpow means that one parent is dead, then so be it lah!

I'm pissed off by the way she talks to hubby and the way she keeps harping what we have done wrong. I don't see where I'm wrong, ok, maybe the damned oranges part, but I've already explained and he has apologized then just shut your trap already!

Since you say I'm already 'jia chu qu' then why must I or him for that matter follow YOUR traditions?! I don't even give a damn for such traditions!

And then YOU still can behave so childishly and return my ang pow! WTF?! Lame ass. I promptly returned my hubby's and my angpows. I frankly don't give a damn.

Happy Chinese New Year~!

2008-02-11T23:26:00.000-08:00

Gong Hei Fatt Choy everyone~! =p

Haven't been updating regularly. Hahaha.

Nothing much to update too lah. Work sucks as usual, life's good with hubby (with it's usual petty fights and tantrums and then kiss and make-up), well, everything's normal lor.

Chinese New Year as usual was off to hubby's hometown, where it was great to see his nephews again! Adorable, really. =p And everyone was hooked on my PSP lah. *sighs* And the things they say and do, really interesting. =p Didn't take much photos, partly because my handphone has no more memory, partly because my phone sucks lah. -_- I need a new phone.

Anyway, still collected lots of angpows this year! Ok lah, even if it's all in Ringgit. -_- But well, at least can all save in his Maybank account. =p

Tomorrow have to start work already, but still feeling kind of sick. Think I drank a tad bit too much on the last night at his hometown. Yeah, I did 'merlioned' a few times. *sighs* My alcohol tolerance level is not as good as before lah. But hey, at least I'm not like, dead drunk. At least I still can manage to change into my PJs, brush my teeth (though I don't know for what since I'm still puking), and went to bed. Of course, to promptly jump out and dash for the toilet for somemore puking. Lol.

Still having the after effects lor. Not to mention having a slight flu now. -_-

Well, still quite a good Chinese New Year. =)

Till the next time... Ciao...

Pissed Off...

2008-01-27T08:52:00.002-08:00

Now my mum says he'll go and do something to my hubby's bike, ask me not to park there anymore. F*** lor. If he dares, I'll call the police. I don't give a damn if he has to go to jail or what. I did what I can, I smsed him in the afternoon to apologize for hitting so hard and made my stand clear. So if he dares to provoke me, I'll definitely will not give face just because he's my brother. Simply because my hubby did nothing to provoke him or what. So if he's gonna take it out on my hubby, he's asking for it. Seriously.

Actually I'm torn between beating the crap out of him and calling the police. See if mum want to see him in jail or in the hospital. Her call.

I mean business. I do as I say.

Sad...

2008-01-27T08:52:00.001-08:00

Well, I finally understand why people say that when your parents hit you, they feel the pain in the heart, not the flesh.

Today I slapped my brother real hard on his face. In front of his girlfriend nonetheless. I got nagged by hubby for that, because he said guys have their ego; no matter what, slapping guys in front of other people is a no-no.

Hey, I feel bad enough as it is, slapping him. Hearing this makes me feel so much worse. That I can't stop crying for a whole 10 mins when that scene keeps replaying itself in my head.

And why did I do that in the first place?

I had an sms from my sis yesterday, that our bro was being damn mean and horrible. Then she called me later at night before I went home that he was being mean to his girlfriend again. I won't go into details, but to summarize, he shouted at her, chased her out, dumped her stuff on the floor, threw her stuff downstairs, shoved my sis when she tried to help the girl keep back her stuff. You get my drift.

How can I just ignore when I know about all these? People who know me should know I have been treated badly in previous relationships. Though not as bad as this. So I feel so much hurt for her. Knowing that she like how I was before, can't simply just walk away.

This morning I woke up, they were about to go out. I didn't scold him yet, since everything seems ok. They went out, and I heard him shouting at her again and she trying to explain. It pains me so much ok. To hear a girl having to grovel like that with no dignity. And she's like a meek little mouse who doesn't dare to speak up and all.

So I stormed out and glared at him, asking what the f***'s going on. I confronted him about how I knew about what happened yesterday and he just scolded the girl, "See what you've done!" And I feel so pissed off. I just scolded him and threatened to whack his sorry ass, and he dared to give me that kind of arrogant look, taunting me, provoking me to do as I said. I tell you, his face is the kind you see on those hooligans' face when they want to fight.

I told him that I won't tolerate such nonsense from him, nor allow him to treat the girl like this. He can retort to ask her to leave and he did not force her to stay. What rubbish! I can understand that she doesn't bear to leave. And I cannot stand him mentally abusing her like this.

I know he won't dare to retaliate nor fight me. But I was too pissed off beyond words, frustrated that he doesn't get my point. So I just slapped him across the face and he started tearing. So did I. I feel so bad slapping him like this.

Sigh, don't know lah. I know what I did may make him treat her worser. It may not make a difference. But I just needed to let him know my stand and that I mean business. I really cannot tolerate knowing that another girl is being bullied like that and I do nothing. If my sis ever finds a boyfriend like my bro, I certainly won't just give a slap. I'll give him a good thrashing.

Thank God my hubby is so much a better man. -_-

A Song for My Hubby~

2008-01-09T20:57:00.000-08:00

Heard this song the other way, and I just so feel it...

Flaws And All by Beyonce

I'm a train wreck in the morning
I'm a bitch in the afternoon
Every now and then without warning
I can be really mean towards you
I'm a puzzle yes in deed
Ever complex in every way
And all the pieces aren't even in the box
And yet, you see the picture clear as day.

[Chorus]
I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
And that's why I love you [3x]

I neglect you when I'm working
When I need attention I tend to nag
I'm a host of imperfection
And you see past all that
I'm a peasant by some standards
But in your eyes I'm a queen
You see potential in all my flaws
and that's exactly what I need.

[Chorus]
I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
and that's why I love you [3x]

[Repeat Chorus]

Random Post...

2008-01-08T23:41:00.000-08:00

My file is missing! WHERE IS IT?! WHO TOOK IT?! Or maybe I misplaced it? Hmmm...
I need to clean up my room. I can't find a place to sleep at night. =x It needs a major overhaul I tell you! I'm so NOT looking forward to Project Clean-up.
I want more money! So many things I wanna buy. New phone for myself and him, new PC for him, new hair colour.
I want a long holiday! Sian of work. I need to rejuvenate myself.
I hate menses. It gives me cramps and tempers. No wonder the whole of last week I'm so easily irritable. Not to mention me cursing and swearing at little things. -_-
Guys are superficial. Most guys. Always judge by looks. Just because my picture, it has generated lots of guys messages and comments. About how sweet, how pretty, and other flirting lines. Lame.
I feel so sian sometimes that I just wanna go away to some remote place with just my iPod, PSP, story books. It's like, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE ALREADY!
I'm itchy to bash somebody up. Just waiting for the opportunity, for some stupid idiot who comes and antagonize me or my ah lao.
I hate most guys. They piss me off. Especially motorists (drivers and riders alike) who are KNN CCBs. Never signal when cutting into other lanes, tailgating, insinuating my ah lao being one of those bad riders, show-off their powerful bikes, etc.
I'm just in an extremely foul mood today. And I foresee for the rest of the week. So beware. I bite.

A Brand New Year...

2008-01-06T20:46:00.000-08:00

And I foresee my favourite colour for this year is... RED~! =p

Bought new red Elmo soft toy cum handphone accessory (but too big, so hang on my make-up pouch instead), new PSP slim in red, new make-up pouch in red, red lighter... Maybe gonna dye red colour too! =x

Speaking of hair, I went to cut a new hairstyle! I've got a short fringe! =p Long time no short fringe already, so not used to it. So coincidentally, Bui also cut her fringe short! =D Not used to this hair, apparently the back of my hair needs to be like, scrunched abit, to create this out-of-bed, tousled look. Only he knows how, and he styled it for me before I thought it was too, not me, so I smoothed it back down. Hahaha. =x He's just good at styling lah. =)

He also cut his hair. Interesting! I like... =D Short in front and sides, and a long tail at the back. Lol. I think daddy's gonna flip when he sees his new hairstyle. =x He's now in Taiwan I think. Should I email him my hubby's photo of his new hairstyle? I think he'll get insomnia instantly. *chuckles*

Happy that I got the PSP! =D It's well-worth the money, seeing how it's being fully utilized. When I'm at work, he's playing with it. When I'm at his place, I play with it. When I'm home, usually my sis's hooked on it. Occasionally, my bro plays with it. ^_^ And bro helped me download more games into my PSP. Now got Crazy Taxi! I can't wait to play that lor! Yesterday he downloaded liao, he was stuck in his room with my PSP. Then my sis went to take from him to play until I went to his place. And then I was busy playing his computer to bother with my PSP and now it's with him. -_-

Oh well, nothing much liao! Going to Malaysia again to dye my hair. Broke lah, can't cut and dye in Singapore. =p

Time really flies, soon another Chinese New Year. Make me remember spending last year's Chinese New Year with him and his family. =)

Suddenly very nostalgic...

Update...

2008-01-03T22:13:00.000-08:00

I'm so happy!

Bought my first ever tech gadget... PSP Slim! In HAWT HAWT RED! I LOVE IT!

Received my bonus mah, not much, but well, better than nothing. I know, some people may say money not earned easily, crazy to splurge like this. But well, I just wanted to pamper myself for once. Since when you see me buy like, really good stuff for myself? Ok, other than the fact of my recent necklace addiction. =p This is my first ever expensive toy I've ever bought for myself ok! So the feeling is different from getting it for free or someone buying it for me. =p Besides, I've already thought for very long before buying it ok!

Anyhow, was so excited upon getting it that I can't help but grin like mad for the next few days and proudly parading it around and playing with it. To hell to those who think I'm being show-off or 'hao lian'. I'm just like a kid who is excited about her new toy mah. What's wrong? =x I need new games though. Anyone wanna give me games for my PSP? =p I'm currently addicted to Diner Dash... Hohoho... =x

Oh, and my ah lao say my expression and stance when I play the racing car game on my PSP is damn interesting. He knows when I'm turning or going straight. Apparently, I hold the PSP the way people hold and maneuver the steering wheel. -_- LOL.

Speaking of driving. Another Singapore Customs booboo from yours truly. =p Remember the first incident where I made the peace sign when the Customs officer asked who's the owner of the passport and it's me? =x This time, was on his bike, and when we come back to Singapore, the Customs will check the boxes of the bikes right? His bike no box, only under the seat there's a compartment where we usually put our raincoats. We lazy to get off, and when the Customs officer asked "Got anything?" I replied, "No box." My ah lao laughed like mad lor, and he never failed to recount this incident to his other friends. -_- Funny meh? True mah... No box = nothing what. Then ah lao say the officer can also see that there's no box. -_-

Oh well, kind of bimbotic behaviour. Lol. =x

Ok lah, nothing much liao... Update another time!!

Fierce...

2007-12-15T21:20:00.000-08:00

I find that I ultra protective of my closed ones. Haha. =p Even if I do seem nonchalant at times, bully them, treat them like dirt at times, when it comes to the crux, I will be a totally different person. I'll be at my meanest and I'll not budge an inch.

I just hate to see others bullying my loved ones. Whether close friends, colleagues, family, even if I do behave like shit towards them sometimes (I swear I not with ill intentions kind lor. =() I still don't allow others to treat them like shit. I'll so bulldoze over them.

Poor deardear kena bullied at work. I find that intolerable. I'm not going to let him take that lying down. So help me God, I'll make sure his company will not have peace. Nope, I'm not going to burn his company down. Tempting I'm sure, but I'll do it in my own way, at what I do best.

And poor Bui so upset at work the other day when I was on MC. *HUGS* I feel bad enough when I make her cry sometimes. Now someone makes her cry, I am not very happy about it. I will not be nasty, but I will not be nice either. When I'm nice, I'm very nice. When I'm not, I'm the bitch from hell.

I wonder why I am like that though. Always so protective. Haha. I still remembered I beat this kid up when he bullied my little brother who was still so small and such a weakling. =p Stole his pencilbox and made him cry during Sunday School. Poor bro came crying to me after his class and yeah, I beat the boy up. =x Not that bad lah. At least no broken bones or what. =p

Anyhow, mess with me, I may keep quiet and ignore. Mess with my loved ones, there'll be hell to pay. And I will resort to fist fighting when need be. That's how I am. Violent. *sniggers* You won't know what hit you.

Quizzes...

2007-11-25T08:16:00.000-08:00

Your Personality Profile

You are pure, moral, and adaptable.
You tend to blend into your surroundings.
Shy on the outside, you're outspoken to your friends.

You believe that you live a virtuous life...
And you tend to judge others with a harsh eye.
As a result, people tend to crave your approval.

The World's Shortest Personality Test

What Kind of Guy Will You Fall For?
	You would fall for the geek. If you're looking for love, consider spending a little more time studying up in the library. To you, there's nothing more attractive than intelligence, shyness, and kindness; your future love may have four eyes and zero social skills, but he'll make up for it in brains and heart.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

Which Winnie the Pooh Character Are You?
	You are Piglet. You are timid, quiet, and like to stay in others' shadows. Though your shyness can irritate some, you are courageous when it counts and are always loyal to your friends.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

From Facebook:

Temperament = Flexible
Nothing seems to bother you - you sail through life crisis free. It's not that your life doesn't have its ups and downs, it's just that you handle everything without unnecessary drama and antics. You approach each day fresh, not worrying about yesterday or tomorrow. You are confident that you can handle anything that comes your way and experience has shown that you are absolutely right about this.

Interests = Simple
You are continually pursuing a simpler and less complicated life - you don't allow yourself to fall victim to all of the "should do's" that society continually bombards you with. You are thoughtful about your life choices and think in terms of yourself, others and the world in which we live. You have a great sense that we are part of something much bigger and we must be good to others, if we want others and the world to be good to us.

Amusement = Adventurous
It's a good thing that you are filled with energy and ambitions (that others sometimes find exhausting) because you're continually looking for a new adventure and exciting experience. You struggle with a continual feeling of restlessness which constantly pushes you to the next level of excitement. Once you have accomplished one thing, you are eager to accomplish something more exciting, riskier and distinguishable.

Passion = Physical
You are a cuddle bug - from a warm hug shared with your best friend to steamy sex with your partner, you enjoy every bit of human contact that you can get. You demonstrate your love for others most fluidly through physical one-on-one contact and you feel the most loved when you are being touched. You feel disconnected when you are physically isolated from others. You're a people person and a lover of all things human.

That's about it I think... =p Sorry for the lack of updates. Office can't blog, and due to a fall-out with mum 2 weeks ago or thereabouts, my access to internet is quite limited, so no updates lor. Anyway am back home, so yah.

Time flies honestly. -_- Soon it'll be Christmas! OMG... I feel so ancient lor... *faints* And it's a second Christmas with him. =p Hehehe... I'm just amazed we've come this far. Since I have really quite short attention span and my previous longest relationship was like 9 months? Hahaha... And before that it was like, 3 months? Not bad lah, until now still so into him... Everyday machiam still honeymoon stage. =x At least everytime he smses my heart will still skip a beat. Or I'll have a silly grin on my face. Not like with JQ, after 6 months already sian half liao. Haha. =p

I'm so lemming for a PSP Slim leh! And pretty handmade necklaces! =p Sigh. But think my PSP will have to wait till January lah. Or maybe never. -_- What to do? I can't anyhow spend like before lor. Not that I'm complaining lah. =p Good lah, at least got aim, direction in life mah. Hahaha...

Hmmm, nothing much liao lah. Nothing else to update. So far so good also lah, not much quarrels with him recently. =p Nothing else interesting in my life liao anyway, since my life revolves around him. Hahaha... Yup, he's the only man in my life! Ok, aside my dad and bro lah. But otherwise I only have eyes for him. Bleah.

Speaking of time flies, soon it'll be 2008. Hmmm, have to start making New Year resolutions... But not as if I'll follow also. =x Whatever it is, I just hope for a smooth year, and hopefully we can get a flat so can move in together! Think when that time comes, I'll be even harder to get, because will be too broke and nua to come out and play liao. =x But I wonder what will happen when we move in together. Lol. =p

Ok, gotta log off liao. =)

Stupid Inconsiderate Bitch...

2007-11-09T13:03:00.000-08:00

Just got home like one hour ago. Until now I haven't bathed, all because of a stupid girl with no manners.

F**k lor. She blardy hell vomitted in the toilet bowl, didn't flush properly, didn't clean up the residue left on the toilet seat and the area between the seat and cover. WTF~! Do you know how f**king gross it is?! And how blardy stinky it is?! HOW THE F**K AM I SUPPOSED TO SHOWER?! And worse still, my laptop is just in front of the toilet lah! How am I supposed to surf my net in comfort?!

End up I have to close the door and spray my perfume outside. -_- And I can't f**king shower, because the back toilet is so cramped itself, and now with the washing machine there, I can't shower there anymore.

So poor me, sweaty and dirty from an all night biking outing, can't f**king shower because of her inconsideration! Do you know how annoying that is?! I was out the whole night in the middle of the rain (ok, drizzle), so I was wet (of course now dry le), and with all the dirt, smoke, etc from riding on the road, I feel so damn dirty lah!

Bitch. No blardy manners. I don't give a damn whether you're sick and dying or drunk. You blardy well clean up after your own mess at other people's house. This is NOT your house toilet, nor the public toilet, nor your own house toilet. Don't you have any manners, discipline? F**k lor, if I do puke in the office toilet lah, and I make a mess, I'll still clean up lor. Smell wise, I can't do much, but at least don't leave unsightly stains lah! Somemore now you're at other people's house lor!

I don't care if others reading this think I'm being too harsh or too worked up. Try being in my shoes and then tell it in my face then I'm unreasonable to be like this. I'll give you a slap across the face.

I'm so going to complain and scold my brother in front of her. Whether she's in the room or in the toilet. I don't give a damn if she hears it and feels upset. I don't give a damn if my brother gets upset and has a fight or argument with me. Partly because SHE is in the wrong, not me. You bring her home to sleep with you, YOU be responsible for her actions. Hell, even my hubby will clean the toilet bowl when he sees shit stains left by one of us. And she can't blardy clean up after herself?!

And partly because MY BRO didn't give a damn about my feelings and hubby's when he made snide/sarcastic remarks about him. HE also made my life miserable last time when hubby was over at my place with all his insensitive remarks. So why the f**k should I care about HIS feelings?! No blardy way.

That's why I believe in karma. What goes around, comes around. You snub my hubby before, now I snub your girl. All's fair. I don't give a shit if my bro picks a fight with me and gives me hell. I'm no blardy pushover and he got it coming. I didn't settle my scores with him then, so I shall settle them now.

I'm still annoyed that I can't shower. I'll wait till mum comes out and if she dares to accuse me of that dirty deed, I'm so gonna scream at her and yell injustice and curse and swear at the girl in my bro's room. F**k lor, no matter how messy, how dirty, how unhygenic I may be, I at least have the decency to not affect other people's lives with my actions.

I still have another hour to go before mum wakes up. -_- Now it's 5.30am. Luckily I don't have work tomorrow, or so help me God, I'll be raising hell at home.

Random Post...

2007-11-07T09:39:00.000-08:00

Actually this is a long overdue post. Wanted to blog about the other time I went back to his hometown in his bro-in-law's car.

Heh, as usual, at tbe Customs, the officer will look at me and the passport. Then he look to and fro for some time before asking who is this (pointing to the passport photo). -_- Ello, only got 2 girls in the car lor. So difficult to recognize meh?

Anyhow, I dunno what the f*** I was thinking. I just grinned broadly and give a V sign. -_- I think the officer also stunned. Ah lao just smacked my head and groaned in exasperation. Lol. =x Yah, kind of stupid I know. I just don't know what's going on in my head to make me have such an action. Duh.

* WARNING: COARSE LANGUAGE USED BELOW. Rated: M18 *

Oh yah, today a STUPID CHEENA SISSY GUY pissed me off. KNN, the f**king asshole is in the blardy wrong, and yet thinks so lowly about our government's rules and regulations and that by his mere 'explanations', he can get away unscathed. How naive and idiotic lah! Never think of the blardy consequences lor!

And CCB, that motherf**ker actually RAISED HIS PCB VOICE AT ME! NOBODY F**KING RAISES THEIR VOICES AT ME OK! Even Elvis also kena my scolding when he raised his voice at me. Don't say Elvis lah, even my ah lao is not spared when on rare occassions he also raises his voice at me.

Anyway, I'm just so f**king pissed with that lor! Stupid sissy boy, I hope you blardy rot on Earth and in Hell. I pray for the day I see your sickening face in the papers saying you're to be jailed or deported or killed. So that I can have a good laugh and will certainly make my day! TMD. If I am the unprofessional kind of person, you can be certain I'll make sure you regret RAISING YOUR BLARDY VOICE AT ME AND BEING SO INSOLENT. Mark my words.

I'm generally not an evil and so full of hatred person. -_- I'm generally nice to everyone. and those who are especially nicer to me, I'll be even nicer. =) But those who f**king are so sickeningly rude and pisses me off, there will be hell to pay. Step on my tail, and I'll NEVER let you off.

The one thing I detest most, is people SHOUTING or even RAISING THEIR VOICES AT ME. NOBODY DOES THAT AND GETS AWAY FROM IT!

So annoyed lah, that I can't do anything to him. CCB. Dulanz. F**king Cheena sissy boy. Hope you kena raped by Bangalas tonight.

If You Could Turn Back Time...

2007-10-31T08:49:00.001-07:00

... would you want to change anything?

As a true Libra, I see things from different viewpoints. =p

If I really want to change, perhaps another family. Sad but true. Reason being if I were born in a different family, perhaps I'll not be the way I am now. I think your family really do play a part in shaping the way you are now. I see myself following my mum's footsteps, but all the bad points. -_- I don't like it. If I were say in a family like my cousins', perhaps, just perhaps, I'll be more ambitious, smarter at work, better in relationships, etc.

If I really want to change, perhaps to be more religious. Never wavering. I do believe there's a God, but many a times, I feel like He isn't watching over me as I'd like Him to. When I was at my most depressive moments, I can't feel Him. I lost the faith along the rocky path. But as my best friend would say, He just has better plans for me, but He's always there. Nah, I'm not preaching. I hate people who preach despite their better intentions. I'm not known for acknowledging people who try and preach me.

Still got others, but I think I'll just stop here. =p

But then again, if I can change things, what I have now will change too. Nothing is constant. And do I want to change things that I have now? Not very likely. Family relationship is better now than before. I have a loving husband who I have a love-hate relationship with. =p (Yah, sometimes he annoys the hell out of me and we fight like, quite constantly as poor Bui would know since she has to listen to me whine and complain and rant about him. Sorry! =x But still, he's still there for me. I'm just a difficult person to be with and so far only he can tahan me.) I enjoy what I'm doing now, really, though a better paycheck would be fabulous. =p I have friends whom I know I can keep for life.

If I really do change the past, I don't think I'll still find this job. I don't think I'll meet these kind of colleagues, friends and acquaintances. I don't think I'll meet those guys from my past. I don't think I'll meet him. I don't think I'll have the current life that I have. My life may be better, maybe worse. You'll never know.

It just makes me think that, one shouldn't focus on the past, thinking about the many 'if onlys', 'what ifs', 'what could haves', etc. Should might as well look forward and see how you can shape your future. What for wishing to turn back time and change things? It's not as if there's a guarantee that your life would be better now. It could just easily become worser.

I'm just so in a philosophical mood. -_- *yawns* I think I think too much sometimes. Lol.

I Wanna Complain...

2007-10-30T09:40:00.000-07:00

Sorry Tam, wanna blog something else more interesting, but I wanna complain! Gonna be draggy. -_- As usual lah, about HIM!

His secondary school classmate invited him to her wedding. Then he never ask me or what, just say he going, then if I follow him what am I gonna do there. WTF. Means he not bringing me lah! -_-

Angry because he never ask me and make his own decision. Also because it makes me feel like he doesn't want to bring me go because too fat and ugly lor. So shameful. *SULKS* Then he gimme crap reasons like she invited him only, he just wanna save money (because if I go, means he gotta fork out more for angpao mah), and doesn't want to inconvenience her by asking if I can go or not.

What the hell lor. To me these are crap reasons. Maybe I'm being unreasonable. Perhaps. But it just annoys the hell out of me. It doesn't help that he is also as bad-tempered as me. So two stubborn mules together, both go nowhere.

But no meh, if wedding dinner of course husband and wife go together what. Even if invitation card never write also expected one mah. So difficult to ask one meh? And ang pao money I cannot fork out half meh? What c**k lor. Maybe she don't know he ROM liao mah, so never ask him and his wife what. Duh.

Anyhow, am just frustrated. *Trying to think happy thoughts*

KL Trip...

2007-10-22T10:04:00.000-07:00

Went ahead with the KL trip! =D So glad we did. Anyhow, we had to go, because his friend had already booked a hotel for us and coach tickets back to Singapore.

Enjoyed myself there, though please remind me NEVER to wear high heels there. Walked like mad lah. I didn't wear my sneakers up, because we wanted to buy new matching sneakers there. And I was going to wear my high boots there to the wedding dinner anyway. And it didn't help that stupid 'auntie visit' came just the day before lor. So tired from the long coach ride up, having blardy cramps and walking with my heavy bag in the stupid heels, made me REALLY grumpy.

And so of course we argued when we reached KLCC. He was grumpy too, because probably tired from the coach ride too, and worried about me, because I was stuck in the toilet for so long. So he was pulling a long face when I finally surfaced from the toilet. Which of course irritated me. But well, as usual lah, we don't argue for long. =p And I'm happy to report that no other arguments during the whole trip, so yeah! (Hey, it's an achievement lor. =p Bui will know why. Lol.)

Anyhow, KL definitely is not a place for me. Too many good food! Went out with his brother's family, and ate SO much! But enjoyed spending time with them. =) Had a good time at the dinner too, with his friends, though I look pretty retarded there, because everyone spoke Cantonese, and my Cantonese is pretty limited. -_- I only understood bits and pieces lor. Worse is that he also started talking to me in Cantonese. -_-

But I'm so proud of myself! *smirks* For once I tried to be unselfish and reasonable and understanding lor. Hahahahaha... Let him have fun going for a foot massage with his friends for slightly less than an hour, instead of making him come back to the hotel with me to countdown for my birthday lor. And I went back and packed our bags for him. It was a total mess when we left for the dinner, because we ended up changing clothes for the dinner. (Brought our ROM suits, because he wanted to wear that, so might as well follow him lor. But ended up last minute changing back to NORMAL clothes. =p And you know I'm a messy person. =x)

So yah, so poor me was alone in the hotel room on my birthday. He came back right after the massage lah. =p Thought he may wanted to go out for supper or something with his friend, since he hasn't met up with him for ages. I had smsed him to say it's ok, I'll be fine on my own. =p

Anyhow, yah, *beams* At least he appreciates all that! Heee... Nothing much on my birthday though, no surprises, what not. *sighs* But well, he's like that lah. What to do. -_- Blockhead. But still a loveable one. =) This trip has been real successful I must say. Hopefully the next one will be just as fun and happy! =) But don't know when lah. Should be next year bah. =(

Anyway, thanks all for the birthday wishes. Really touched. =) *muacks* Love ya all!

Funeral...

2007-10-17T10:57:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I hate myself for being so petty. Like I told Bui on Monday, when his godma had passed away, I hated myself for not accompanying him on Sunday when he went to visit her. Granted, I didn't know she was so sick. I thought he was only going to drop by and see her. I had sulked because he was about to leave the house without me, without telling me where he was going. So when I had thrown tantrum before he stepped out, he just said he was going to his godma, and only when I sulked and asked why he didn't ask me, did he ask. By then I was already fuming because it's like, HELLO, this type of thing don't need to ask lor. You tell me I'll sure go with you one. But then when he asked I refused to go and sulked in the room. Only when he returned, did he explain that he was just worried that I'll be uncomfortable or scared being there since she was so sick.

And then Monday morning, she passed away.

So yeah, I still felt much regret for not going, so throwing tantrums. *sighs* I just feel so bad. Not to mention feeling guilty for daring to even THINK how my KL trip and birthday is ruined because he said most probably we're not going to KL anymore to attend the wedding. -_- Bad right? Haiz.

Anyhow, I just hope he won't be feeling so sad. Because he sort of thinks he was a jinx, because she died the next day after seeing him. But it was otherwise. Apparently, she had deteriorated on Wednesday or something, and then she just couldn't fall asleep. Only after seeing him, did she sleep and then she never woke up. =( She even bought him a gold ring after his mum showed her our ROM photos, which her kids passed to him yesterday.

Sighs. I just wish I don't have to attend anymore funerals. (I went back with him to accompany him.) Depressing. And I hate how he doesn't tell me how he feels, what he's thinking.

But this whole issue has taught me something. That you don't know when you'll die. It's best to have no regrets. At least, more or less, his godma shouldn't have much regrets. Seeing how she had waited to see him before she left. She had said her goodbyes to him. And I really should learn to control my stubborness and temper. -_-

Only he can tahan me and lets me off for all my tantrums, stubborness and such. I think only he can really love me despite all my faults.

Jaded...

2007-10-07T09:42:00.000-07:00

I don't know why, but am feeling so jaded.

I'm sick of feeling this way. I want to go back to feeling so carefree and happy-go-lucky. But have I ever felt that way before in the first place?

Why can't things be simpler? And yet sometimes it's me who think things into things more complicated than they really are.

Hopefully the reason why I'm feeling this way is because of PMS. PRE. =(

Usually when I'm having PMS, I get pretty oversensitive. Like, way overboard. So yah, I guess what I'm saying is that I feel like he loves me lesser because I'm getting so fat.

*sighs*

Times like this, I wish I were aneroxic.

My Birthday Wishlist...

2007-09-26T00:50:00.000-07:00

My Birthday Wish List:-

1) A new Sony Ericsson phone
– my phone 'koyak' liao leh... but I'm waiting for the latest phone to finally arrive. K850i. One of the best. But also quite like W960i too. Touch-screen. Love that!

2) A new BIG pillow
– to replace my old pillow in the office? Wahahahahaha...

3) Nintendo DS Lite
– pretty please? 2nd hand also can... =p I think the games quite cute leh! And handy for me when I go over to HIS place and he's surfing the net and ignoring me.

4) A sugar-daddy
– to buy me all the things I want and yet don't need. -_- I also want to be disgustingly rich and collect mobile phones as a hobby. *pouts*

5) Miniature perfume set
– I love anything miniature, period. Some miniature perfume bottles are so uniquely shaped. Interesting. Those cute little cakes, food, figurines are so darn cute can? =p When I have my own home, I'm gonna make sure he buys me a glass cabinet for me to fill with cute little trinkets.

6) A new soft toy, something like 'Jimmy'
– one of my weakness; soft toys just make me go "OOH SO KEWTTT". -_- I think that's probably the only time anyone will see the girly side of me. Hahaha… =p I think when I have my own home, I'm gonna have a "Soft Toys" corner. And my bed's gonna be KING SIZED, so that I can bring them to bed with me. Well, worse come to worst, he can go sleep on the floor... *chuckles*

7) Christian Dior eye-shadow set
– the pink casing with a big 'bling bling' D lettering in front? I think it's awfully pretty! Though I don't know if I'll have much use for that, because I don't really apply eye shadows. Don't know how, to be frank. I only know how to draw smoky eyes. But that's easy. Just draw thick eyeliner and go to sleep. Wake up with instant smoky eyes. Lol!

8) Laptop
– I want a laptop to call my own. Compact and portable. So that I can bring it over to his place and surf net too.

9) Story books
– As thick as possible, preferably romance? Or touching kind. I like books that can make me cry. =p Thick because it can keep me occupied for quite some time. Hahahaha. None of those erotic fiction, as Bui would have thought, I'm sure. =p Don't know leh, I prefer reality than fantasy. =x

10) Pet
– I'd love a pet mouse can? =D Dogs are too high maintenance lah. Imagine the vaccinations, food, etc, gonna cost quite abit. And not as if I'm very rich lor. But a pet mouse, well, it's easier to handle and to bring around too! =p But must make sure he'll do the cleaning up for me. Kekekeke...

11) Hair Salon Voucher
– I need a new hairstyle! Tempted to do like Lyna leh, but later sure got people say I trying to copy her. Then sian liao lor! I already long time ago wanna perm my hair like that one leh. *SULKS* But I wanna colour my hair also. Hmmm, don't know what colour also. Maybe someone can offer to go with me and give comments and entertain me? =x

12) Something from Edynae http://edynae.livejournal.com/
- I love her stuff! My sis intro-ed me to this site and I REALLY wanna get something from there but seems like quite difficult lah, cos everything gets snapped up within an hour! Do go there and have a look ok! =p *BIG HINT*

And no, I don't want a tub of mayonnaise nor cheese. -_- Wait till I'm pregnant I might consider that. Lol. =p

But honestly, those are like, so material stuff, which I can do without. =) If I'd really have to make a wish, it's just a better life for us, at least to have our own house, fully renovated. The rest of the things, well, as long as I try to save more each month, I sure can get them myself anyway! =)

But why do I have to celebrate my birthday in Malaysia?! -_- Last year's birthday, was still in Malaysia, though coming back here lah. But this year's birthday also same case lor! *SULKS* Not fun one. I want to have a proper celebration! So sad, I last year no birthday cake on my birthday... Because was in Genting lor, on the way back! He got offer to buy lah, but aiyah, no small slices of cake... And then there was only me, him, his sister and bro-in-law, buy one cake and can't finish like quite stupid lor... So end up I tell him don't buy le... But of course got the big teddy bear as present! =p Hehe... Though I don't think this birthday he'll get anything... Because our anniversary I also didn't get him anything! =x Lol...

Can someone please tell him blatantly that he better do something romantic for my birthday?! Because I think subtle hints are lost with him... -_- Don't need to buy me expensive things lor! Handmade stuff I also like one lor! Also 'lomantik' mah! *pouts*

Guys are mostly SO NOT ROMANTIC one! *grumbles* Yesterday I also was talking to my student, saying how in the previous episode of the 9pm Channel 8 drama serials, Chen Hanwei's character was like, so romantic lor, balloons and teddy bear I think in the car-boot, and asked the girl to open the boot in the pretext of getting something. Then that student said the same thing as him lah "Wah lao, expensive lor, romance! Think no need money one meh?" Liews, how expensive can it be wor?! Not as if asking for 1-carat diamond or 9999 red roses, or what lor. >_<

Men. BAH!

Kneecap Pain Pain... =(

2007-09-25T09:24:00.000-07:00

From Tam's blog:

You Are a Flashy Red Bra!

Outgoing, friendly, and fascinating.
You're a charmer, with your pick of the men.
But you want a man who's as magnetic as you are.
You need someone who can keep up with your all night gab fests!

What Kind of Bra Are You?

Doesn't seem like me leh... I where got charmer? -_- But yeah, need someone who can keep up with me! Or more... =p I can't stand boring guys... Because I'm already boring le, wah liews, with a more boring guy who can't keep me entertained, I'll probably die of boredom! Lol...

Oh yah, yesterday (Monday), slipped and banged my knee on the stairs lah. Was raining when he sent me to work, and was wearing the raincoat for my shoes (whatever it called lah), and it was slippery. Walked up the stairs and slipped lor. Wah liews, more painful than tattooing lor! I literally dragged myself up the stairs and stumbled into the office before collapsing onto the chair, because was seeing stars le. -_- That intense ok, the pain?! Felt like puking and fainting. Liews. But after awhile ok lah. Only when Bui tried to rub on my kneecap, I almost slapped her lah. -_- PAIN LOR! Boss worse. Press so hard when I whined to her about it. >_<

Went home and he also tried rubbing. Some parts of the kneecap still not so pain, but kaoz, at one particular spot, the pain was like, long and intense lor! Screamed the house down. =x And feel like got creaking sound sia. He said maybe had hurt my knee ligament or something. Because was slightly swollen, and that spot wasn't exactly bruised. Also whined to him about how this stupid ah pek who was sitting at the stairs, see me fall, and just went "HA HA", without helping. Stupid MF. If I wasn't in so much pain, I'd have cursed and swore at him and threw my shoe at that blardy fella.

Anyway, today ok lah, can walk, only just now when I climbed the stupid escalator which had stopped working, kneecap still hurt. *whines* Ended up wabbling up the stairs. Lol.

Hmmm, nothing much actually. Had a big fight with him during the weekend over an issue, and which I also made known to him some unresolved issues from the past. It's difficult lah, for two people to be together, because of different values, expectations, desires, interpretations, etc. What he seems as ok, is not ok with me. Vice versa. Depends if you want to accept the differences or resolve them by coming to a compromise. Me, I'm usually the one who throws tantrums and he gives in, and I'll be easily placated. Bottomline is, end up there's no proper acceptance that he's that way, and no proper solution. So I guess it all added up and I threw it in his face when I quarrelled with him over an issue. Guess communication is quite important.

Oh well, all's well now, though I don't know if the issues have been resolved or what. But at least I have done my part and told him what I feel and don't like. Up to him if he wants to take them into consideration.

See lah, my entry super long right? =p

Anyway, yeah, birthday coming soon! Gonna celebrate with colleagues (present and ex) early in the month, because especially for me, knowing myself, by end of the month, I'm super broke, and won't have money to go out lah. Lol. Then not nice lor, everytime people jio me out I have to give excuses why I cannot go. Usually if I don't join you guys for outing, most of the time, it's because I'm broke lor, honestly. Not because I want to spend quality time with him. (Ok, that may be partly the reason at times... =p But mostly also because NO MOOLAH!)

Will type up my wish list next entry bah. Actually have written an entry titled My Birthday Wishlist leh, but hor, office block Blogger,so yah, cannot update. WTH.

Ok, I'm heading off to zzzzz...

About Libras...

2007-09-17T05:02:00.000-07:00

From Tam's blog:

About Libra: Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful, generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible.

My comments as below:

1) Nice to everyone they meet.

Hmmmm. Depends; I would say usually, unless you have a kiam-pah face which I see liao and I 'bu shuang' lah. Or you come in with a dao face which annoys me. But I guess true in a way, I'll still make an effort to smile and say hi to people I meet, unless too bad, that day I PMS-ing or somebody had irritated me early in the morning. -_-

2) Can't make up their mind.

This also depends leh! Most of the time I can't make up my mind, which explains my procrastination habit. =p And which explains my behavior, like I can be sweet and understanding to him one minute, and the next I'm giving him hell over a certain issue. =x It's like, I can't make up my mind whether I should be angry with him or just let it go.

3) Have own unique appeal.

Errr... what's that sia. I don't find myself appealing in any way. -_- But I think I'm unique lah… Everyone's unique for that matter! =p My uniqueness? I don't know; simplemindedness? You tell me lah. I ask him what he likes about me, he say my eyes, my boobs… Like, wtf lor... Can someone slap him for me?! =p

4) Creative, energetic, and very social.

Creativity I have none. Wish I had Bui's creativity! Then I can do nice nice cards and pictures for him anytime. -_- Energetic? I'm a lazy bum who likes to sleep leh! Very social? Not really, only perhaps within close friends; but as a whole, I'm not a very sociable person. I scared of interaction with people. -_-

5) Hates to be alone.

Hannor hannor! =p Even though I'm not very sociable, I don't like to be alone, even if I sometimes anti-social. I just don't like facing many people lor. I like smaller group interactions, like maybe just with him only, with my sister, with closer friends or colleagues like, one-to-one, etc?

6) Peaceful, generous.

I'd like to think I am the above! =) But hor, peaceful ar, abit salah leh. Since I like to pick fights with him. -_- But I hate fighting or arguing lah for that matter. Recently I haven't been really peaceful. No idea why. I'm always itching to get into fist fight. Especially with people who are damn fucking rude. Generous, I think so, that's why it annoys me when people are calculative towards me. Or rather, it annoys me more when it happens way after payday and the next payday is still some time away. -_-

7) Very loving and beautiful.

Hee, I'd like to think so too! =p Except for the beautiful part lah. -_- Everyone is prettier than me lor. I wonder what does "very loving" constitutes sia...

8) Flirtatious.

=x My behaviour may seem flirtatious, but I really, honestly have no intent on flirting with anyone. I very guai one ok! Unlike HIM! HMMPPHH! *angry* Bui may know what I'm talking about... Hahaha... Since I always complain to her... Poor thing... =x

9) Give in too easily.

Just call me Miss Pushover. -_- Maybe too simpleminded? No will power lah. I very easy to con one. *rolls eyes*

10) Procrastinators.

*sighs* Don't I know it... Just check out my room, my office workspace, my goals... -_- There's always something that will distract me... I need more will power and determination!

11) Very gullible.

Aka stupidity? Wish I knew how to be less gullible. Maybe I wouldn't be hurt so easily then. Maybe that's why kena 'conned' by him liao... =x he and his honey-coated words in the beginning... hopefully he doesn't read this... wahahahahaha... but he knows I'm joking lah... =p

Feeling Negative...

2007-09-13T07:12:00.000-07:00

I hate...

... being misunderstood.
... being away from and without him.
... being shouted at or showed black faces.
... stupid people who expect to be spoonfed.
... people who are so slow.
... waking up early in the morning.
... his bro-in-law (the one with 3 kids).
... feeling insecure, paranoid, negative.
... crying so hard and nobody to comfort me.
... inquisitive people who are actually being kaypohs.
... being so sucky at most things.
... not having enough to spend.
... rude people who don't know how to say "Excuse me", "Sorry", "Thank you".
... being so fat and ugly.
... not being able to do things I really wish to.
... myself.

If You Love Someone...

2007-09-10T09:38:00.000-07:00

Sounds familiar? Well, it's actually "If you love someone, let him/her go." And of course, the rest of it goes something like, "If it he/she never returns, then it wasn't meant to be." Or something like that.

Just finished reading Jodi Picoult's book 'Mercy'. Nice. =) Inside, there was this phrase that struck out: "If you love someone, you'll take him/her back." The story behind this was about this husband who had an affair.

But how true is it? You take him back, but will things be able to go back to normal? Will you be able to trust him again? Won't you be tormented by his past misdeed(s)? Will you be able to forget what he had done?

Then what?

Or is it better to just let go?

Our solemnizer had a talk with us before the ROM, and had talked about this actually. He told us of this story where the wife had came crying to him when she found out about his affair. The husband, remorseful, had also came to him at a separate timing. The solemnizer had a chat with the wife, and then with the husband, and she decided to forgive him and they started life anew in another country.

Touching story no doubt, but how many people can do that?

Your heart may forgive, but your mind never forgets.

If he does have an affair one day, I know I'll never forget it. Will I forgive him? Maybe, but certainly it will take a long time. Will I take him back? I honestly don't know.

All I do know, is that I won't love him any lesser for that. But I will still won't be able to forget it, I will still be affected by the voices in my head, reminding me of it, taunting me about it. And then will I choose to let go because I can't live with that?

*sighs*

See what I mean by my previous post on "thinking too much"?

Probably afraid of karma I suppose. What goes around, comes around.

30 Things About Me...

2007-09-09T08:18:00.000-07:00

1. I love tidbits!
Think everyone would know lah. But funnily, I'm not exactly a chocolate person, come to think of it.

2. I've been acting my whole life.
As in I put on a mask with different groups of people; not that I'm fakeo in friendships lah, but well, just know how to hide innermost feelings from most people, unless they are people I trust and love, I tend to be more vocal bah. Certain groups of people are more outgoing and open-minded, so obviously I have to act like them mah, or what's the point in joining them? That's my thinking of course.

3. I am a very contradictory person.
Maybe because I'm Libran? Tend to like to look at things from different perspectives. And then I don't know which side to choose. Whether to listen to my heart, my head, my friends, my family, my angel side, my devil side... -_-

4. I'm a super crybaby.
Dysfunctional tear ducts, what to do? I cry when I'm angry, sad, upset, stress, sick, etc. If I'm sad and I cry, usually it's hard to stop. -_-

5. I'm oversensitive/emotional.
Cry easily at sappy stories, movies, scenes, etc. Angry easily too; little things can annoy the hell out of me. Tend to blame myself if things go wrong, or if people around me are angry or sad. And yet sometimes I won't say anything about it.

6. I'm super temperamental.
I can be happy one moment, angry at another, and sad yet another. It's a wonder I haven't gone insane with this tumultuous emotions coursing through me. -_- Totally unpredictable that's me. =p You'll never know when I'll be super mad at you.

7. I hate others raising their voices at me!
It's darn annoying can? JT likes to do that. So sometimes shout back at her. Know that she probably didn't mean it that negatively as I see it, but I just don't like it can?

8. I hate others who gimme black faces!
Literally translated from Chinese ar. =p Yah, if after processing and I feel that I'm not in the wrong, it's not my fault, etc, I'll be damn angry lah. And my mood will be spoilt the whole day.

9. I hate others who are super inquisitive about very personal parts of my life.
Like my mum lah! Annoying lor, the way she nags on about us getting a flat, how much he earning, etc. I'm not ashamed at how little he earns, how less educated he is, how uncouth he may seem, etc. But I just cannot stand the look on her face and others which clearly shows that they look down on him. Which is why those kind of questions annoys the hell out of me?

10. I am super insecure.
If you are given my old blog links to read, you'll see how so. -_- I just don't see anything good about me. No, seriously. Not like trying to garner sympathy, or etc. That's what I hate most too. That's why I need alot of reassurance. ALOT.

11. I am quite a private person.
Hiding my feelings, thoughts, etc is something I've always been doing. Because I hate talking about them and people keep asking me questions, look at me like I'm oh-so-pitiful, giving me answers that I don't want to hear, or telling me stuff that though are truths, but are so like stabs to my heart.

12. I like writing!
Poems, stories, blogs. Poems, only when I'm depressed. Don't ask me why, but I can't write happy poems. I can't find the words to describe them. -_- Stories, aiyah, just some romance novels. Short stories more like. Used to scribble my stories on A4 papers, but don't know where I've thrown them to. = But yeah, I can be very long-winded when I start to write/blog, because the words just flows. Perhaps it's my way of releasing my inner thoughts which usually I'm not so verbal about.

13. I am quite a loner.
Prefers to be alone. Or with him. Or with my closer friends. Or as long as it's with a smaller group of people. Don't know, just don't really know how to mix with people? Though you see me like very kawan-kawan ar, but actually I don't really know how to interact in a group. Because sometimes feel abit left out in the topics they talk about. Maybe my fault at times for being anti-social. But I feel most comfortable being alone with a book and music. =p

14. I've always wanted to be a good mom.
Eh, don't laugh leh! *sulks* I not like most people, so career-driven, so motivated, so ambitious, etc. I simple-minded can? =p I just want to be a working mom. Heh. Too bad lah, no money. He's right lah, get flat first before thinking of that.

15. I'm simple-minded/naive.
Good or bad? Don't know. I'm contented easily; I just need a good paying job, close friends, my own family, a place to call my home. Actually, even if I'm stuck at this hell-hole, if I still have him and he doesn't cheat on me, have affairs, those kind of shit, I think I'll still be happy. =) Haha, I do think so naively at times eh?

16. I adore little animals and kids!
Kids are little animals mah! Lol. =p But love the furry little things, oh so cute lor! =D I wanna buy a small rodent leh. But I sure lazy to change the bedding and clean the cage lor. Think it will die of neglect lah. -_- So better not be murderer. Not as if I'm not anyway. *sighs* Right Bui?

17. I'm so a sucker for romance!
Oh sweep me off my feet with roses, champagne and serenade me under the moon and stars~ Haha. Blame it on all the romance novels that I was hooked on since teenage years lah. Lol. Hmmm, but why the hell did I choose him who knows no romance?! -_- As my first ex who knew me truly, I'll feel romanced even if it's small surprises or gifts every now and then. Even if it's just bookmarks, cute pens, etc, that's enough for me. =p

18. I love soft toys!
I have enough soft toys at home to open a mini shop ok! =x But of course, most of them are from quite some time back, but yeah, I love soft toys lah! Especially those like my office pillow's skin! =p I'm very bad, sometimes I buy soft toys for other kids, end up I buy extra for myself, or keep those toys and buy other stuff for them. =x

19. I'm fiercely protective over my loved ones.
Friends, family members. Yup, and I will resort to violence if provoked, no doubt about that. Scary? =p Nah, just that when I'm really agitated, I won't hesitate to raise my fist. When I'm angry enough, fear will no longer be in my dictionary. I still remember when my bro was bullied during Sunday School and cried to me after service, I went after the bully and knocked him over. Few years back I think, there was this madman harassing my mum, scolding her, shouting expletives, taunting comments at her while she was playing tennis. One day I accompanied her and he was doing that again. Confronted him and when he threw his packet of coffee at me, all hell broke loose and yes I did fight him. Fists, and chairs flew lah. Lol. Anyway, I won't hesitate to stand up for my loved ones if they kena bullied.

20. I've had asthma before.
Don't know why my asthma will go away leh. Got like that one meh? -_- I miss having the inhaler leh. Sweet taste. Lol. Hmmm, maybe I didn't have asthma, just that was addicted to the inhaler only? Maybe yah? Hahaha.

21. I used to go to church!
Actually this is interesting. How do you define Christians? I don't go to church anymore. Partly because nobody I know goes, or if they go, it's like so far lah. Also because I'm lazy. =p I rather sleep late on Sunday mornings. But I do believe there's a God, I know He exists, I know He always has a plan for each of us. Sometimes I do pray to Him, talk to Him. Of course not like, pray for Him to let me strike Toto lah, though that would be nice =x but I think His answer will either be No or Wait. -_- So am I considered Christian? =p Used to love going to church, singing the hymns, especially during Christmas, my favourite part would be the carols! ^_^ Missed going caroling. *sighs* Those were the days.

22. I am an ultimate bookworm.
I love reading! Since young always been caught reading books at any time of the day. Don't know why I love reading, since my parents don't like reading. In fact, they discourage me from reading lah! Except if I'm reading assessment books, textbooks of course. Otherwise, they are annoyed if they find me reading books, and had even gone to the extent of banning me from reading romance fiction, Archie comics. Former because later I'll be like boy-crazy and won't concentrate on studies, latter because the words too small, spoil my eyesight. -_- Reading brings me to another world, where I'm non-existent, where I can be anywhere but in reality.

23. I think too much for my own good.
Worst habit ever. I hate doing this! I'll end up thinking of all the possible scenarios, things that may happen, and I get upset over the unhappy stuff, happy at the happy stuff, and end up feeling upset and happy and God-knows-what-other-emotions. End result? A very confused me. -_- That's why one minute I can say "Never mind, it's ok" and smile, and the next, I start being angry and say "Actually it's not ok!" and I'll start sulking. Poor him, I must say. =p

24. I AM shy!
Oei! STOP LAUGHING! I am shy ok! =p That's why I always seem quite unfriendly at the beginning. Because I don't know what to say, so I just keep quiet. I was the kind who is scared even to request ketchup from waiters at restaurants. Yes, and this was only a few years back, before I started working ok! And precisely why I hate doing Orientations; they freak me out.

25. I've always wanted to migrate.
I really want to migrate or work overseas, even if it's for a short period of time! Maybe migrate to Aussie! I love the life there, the people, the beach, the food… I'm also interested in going Japan to teach English. One of my dreams. =p But don't think so lah. Don't think I'm capable of surviving alone in other countries. -_-

26. My aspiration was to be a kindergarten teacher, or playgroup teacher.
Hmmm, simply because I love kids? =p But they usually require you to have Early Childhood Education Diploma, which I don't have and now can't afford to study. Besides, it also won't earn much. So scrap that idea le. *sighs* Maybe as a part-time job? That would be cool... =)

27. I sometimes do get into depressive state.
I hate it when I go into depressive state. I get angry at everyone, or sad about life, and just have no mood for anything. I'll just be no different from a zombie! And no books or music can cheer me up, because when I'm in a depressive state, I listen to depressing songs. -_- So not healthy. And yes, I do have suicidal thoughts. It's a wonder I'm still here. Really.

28. I have a Love-Hate relationship with mum.
To others, she's the perfect mum, who bakes, cooks, does housework for the family, etc. Takes cares of her daughter's friends if and when they come over. Blah blah blah. But who sees the cane marks so brutally given and with lousy reasons like 'because your daddy caned your brother'? Who hears how she scolded me, sometimes using expletives and hurting words like 'he made you a prostitute' or 'you might as well go and get f***ed at geylang'? Who sees how she punished me by banishing me to the balconey even when it's cold and wet there or to the corridor and make me kneel there? I could so write an essay on how she treated me before. And how much I hated her then. Of course now things are considerably better lah. Because I learnt to strike back and she knows she can't hurt me no more. But probably because mellowing down as age creeps up to her. So yeah, she sometimes does behave like a bitch lah, but well, most of the time, her heart IS in the right place, just that I don't agree with her behavior that's all.

29. I can cook!
Though ok, maybe not like, whip up a 3 course meal, pretty desserts like in cafes, restaurants, etc. But ok, at least I can cook like, proper meals, with rice, meat, vegetables? =p Though I wish I knew how to bake lah.

30. I can read people's minds.
I know Bui must be thinking how come I haven't mentioned sex, or much about him, etc. =p Lol... Though hor, actually this point is because I've run out of things about myself lah. Maybe you can tell me about me? Or how you see me? Idea eh? Ask others to write 10 things about yourself. Hmmm...

~ END ~

Nobody I want to tag leh. How? =p

First Entry...

2007-09-09T08:07:00.000-07:00

Heyhey! Welcome to Me & My Drab Life! Lame... -_-

Bored lah, cos Mr Ma is busy packing his stuff for his trip to Jakarta. So create new blog for you guys! Well, actually not exactly for you guys lah. I like keeping many different blogs, for different phases in my life, for my best friends, for my own private reading (not RA lah, just, don't want people to know about how sad I am as a person. -_-), etc.

Well, my blog entries should be quite long I think, from past experiences. Haha. Because it's usually an outlet for me, since I don't really talk to others about personal stuff unless they started the ball rolling and I only talk about stuff I'm more comfortable about. And rubbish of course, anything to entertain and get others' attention eh?

Wish I can write short and sweet like Bui ah! =p Nice, I like. Mine machiam essay, think end up nobody wanna read also. And it gets repititive at times. =p

Anyway, stay tuned for the next entry. Got tagged by Bui lah, and you can see how MY blogging differs from hers and Tam's. =p People's 30 things about themselves are short and sweet and to the point. Mine, as if writing thesis. Hahaha! You shall see why...

Me & My Drab Life...

Bad things come in threes...

Canon S95

New Toys!

Time to let go...

Memorable Birthday!

Busy October!

Cooking!

Long Weekend!

Home Sweet Home...

So Proud of Hubby...

Our Love Nest!

My First Medal...

Our Love Nest Update

Idiot Car Owners Who Piss Me Off!

Some progress finally!

I Wanna Go Ikea!

Busy busy bumblebee!

Damages Done To Our Wallets...

Department dinner @ Swissotel!

Photos...

House Keys!

CNY and a Fucked Up Man!

Emo-ing Time

Happy 2010!

Woohoo!

Lalalalala...

Interesting Message...

New Job, New Chapter in Life...

Update Again!

Mixed Emotions...

What's in your name?

Randomness

To Go or Not to Go, That is the Question

My Hamster Just Gave Birth!

Update~

Back from Bangkok

Busy Day...

One More Week...

Makeover on Sunday

Virgin Trip To Bangkok

The Lazy One PMS-ing

I'M GOING TO HONG KONG!!!!!!!

Finally It's Over...

House-Hunting

Sad... =(

I HATE YOU.

Girls...

PMS Sucks...

Regrets...

Not me, just my ex, who contacted me during the weekend and yeah, said how sorry he was, blah blah blah.

One Republic Ft. Timbaland - Apologize

Sian Week...

Yipee~!

Kids say the darnedest things...

Sick...

Angry...

Happy Chinese New Year~!

Pissed Off...

Sad...

A Song for My Hubby~

Random Post...

A Brand New Year...

Update...

Fierce...

Quizzes...

What Kind of Guy Will You Fall For?

Which Winnie the Pooh Character Are You?

Stupid Inconsiderate Bitch...

Random Post...

If You Could Turn Back Time...

I Wanna Complain...

KL Trip...

Funeral...

Jaded...

My Birthday Wishlist...

Kneecap Pain Pain... =(

About Libras...

Feeling Negative...

If You Love Someone...