Sad... =(

Feeling really sad, because while me and hubby were off at his hometown, my 2 hammies apparently got into a fight... My Ben Dan went to bite a chunk off his Huai Dan's head... *cries* Everytime I see his bald patch I cry... =( Feel so upset and hurting, because it must have hurt alot and poor Huai Dan must have been tormented... I know my Ben Dan has been bullying his Huai Dan these few weeks, but I thought it was nothing, so didn't separate them... Sigh...

So angry with naughty Ben Dan... Shall rename him as Wang Ba Dan liao... Hubby so angry with my Ben Dan that he threaten to feed him to the stray cats downstairs... *cries* Now I just wanna go home and sayang poor Huai Dan and make him as comfortable as possible... =(

I don't dare to wash poor Huai Dan, because of his wound... So I ended up washing the cage while hubby washed him... Saw spots of blood and I just cried lah... Cried myself to sleep also... Poor lil fella... =( Then hubby went to apply yellow lotion on his wound... -_- And now my Ben Dan is stuck in the Tupperware, because didn't have time to buy new cage for him...

I WANNA CRY AGAIN LAH!!!!! *BAWLS*

I HATE YOU.

I actually wrote a long entry, but I decided I'll just post it in my personal blog instead.

But I still want to rant here. And yell to the whole world that "I FUCKING HATE YOU V".

You know who you are. And I shan't comment further here.

I can only say just hearing your voice makes me wanna hurl.

And yeah, you're not the only one facing 'FAMILY ISSUES'. I am also facing FUCKING family issues. So what's the big fuck about yours?!

Yuppers. I'm FUCKING PISSED. And whoever dares tell me not to use such language, you can FUCK OFF already, because this is my FUCKING blog, and I can FUCKING write what I want.

Girls...

Maybe because I'm not that kind of girl, but I don't understand why some girls can be so cheap go message other guys to add them in Facebook. Especially when the profile clearly states he's MARRIED. Which means, HANDS OFF MY PROPERTY WOMAN! Grrr... I do trust my hubby won't do anything YET. But whether he'll still be as sure when the girl keeps pestering or messaging him, etc, that's another matter.

I simply detest sluts like these type of girls. Call me possessive, I don't care.

I just don't like other girls tempting my hubby. Period. Go get your own. Cheap bitch.

PMS Sucks...

I hate PMS-ing and treating him like shit. I know I shouldn't, but when I'm PMS-ing a few days before the stupid thing, I get really irrational, irritable, insecure (extreme), etc. I don't mean to give myself excuses for treating him so badly, but well, I'm just so glad he's so tolerant, despite getting fed up with me. And I can't help but cry when he says he will not have any regrets marrying me. =(

I just hope he'll still be like this. That we can go back to our dating days. When I wasn't so insecure, when I wasn't so annoying. Sometimes I really hate the person I've become. I need my confidence back. =|

Regrets...

Not me, just my ex, who contacted me during the weekend and yeah, said how sorry he was, blah blah blah.

Fool me once, I'm naive; fool me twice, I'm stupid.

How appropriate this song is...

One Republic Ft. Timbaland - Apologize

I'm holding on your rope,

Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearin what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothin new
I loved you with a fire red-
Now it's turning blue, and you say...
"Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

Bridge (guitar/piano)

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
It's too late to apologize, yeah
I said it's too late to apologize, yeah-
I'm holdin on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground...

Sian Week...

This week has been horrendous. What with the Career Fair, the textbook collection, etc. I can't wait to claim my compensated leave and have some ME time. I want to go shopping!

So many movies I wanna watch also! Where will I find the time and money to watch ALL of them?!

1) The Leap Years

2) P.S I Love You

3) Kungfu Dunk

4) Death Note: L Change The World

5) Away From Her

6) Water Horse

7) Sky of Love

Should be getting my new phone at the I.T. Fair instead! Because worry that later got roadshow there and it's cheaper. Wah, I'd feel blardy pissed if I get it now and find that if I had bought it at the roadshow I would have saved more money! -_-

So anyway yeah, still using the cuckoo phone. =p

Yipee~!

Heehee, so excited! I'm FINALLY going to get a new handphone! =x Courtesy of my hubby! ^_^ Not cheap also lor! Sigh... But I REALLY REALLY like that phone, despite the many problems posted by users in those forums. =( My phone is more expensive that his by almost 300 bucks! Yah, he's getting a new phone too, because his China phone is really the pits! Interesting and quite alike SE W960i, but lots of firmware problems I think!

Before anyone thinks we've struck lottery, it's not that ok. Just that he finally got his insurance compensation, so we have some spare money to pamper ourselves for once! He's considered really thrifty liao, because before the money came in, he had so many things he wanted to get, like new phone, laptop, digital camera. But now he says he only getting the phones for us, the rest save up. -_- Think if I were him, I couldn't care less and start buying all the stuff I've always wanted but don't have the finances to get. =x That's why I told him the money don't put in my account. I'll just spend them. =x

Anyway I can hardly wait lah! ! But can only wait until Sunday then can get! Hopefully can get it on the spot! -_- Gosh, I need to start shopping for accessories for my new phone, like pouch, screen protector, etc. Hahaha. =p My current phone is like so 'koyak' liao, bought in 2006! First phone I bought with my own pay. Lol. So I don't bear to trade-in when I'm buying the new phone. =p May have saved him 100 bucks, but I don't care, it has so many memories lah! Not to mention it's so hardy, with me being so careless, throwing it into my bag, having it fall out of my jacket onto the road and it falling apart, etc, it's still in working condition! =p Really like my phone, but time for a change!

Another thing is I can't wait for this week to be over. Including Saturday! I'm just SOOO tired. I really want to go for a holiday. =( As in a REAL holiday, not just going to KL or his hometown for like wedding, or etc.

I want to be positive, and keep smiling but it's so trying...

Kids say the darnedest things...

So cute that Matthew (my boss's son).

Boss: ... Is it raining?
Matthew: No, it's Matthew!

-_-||| *speechless*

*bursts out laughing*

I think it's so cute lah... =p

Sick...

Feel sick, but can't go on leave nor take MC. Sian. Throat hurts like mad, I feel like I'm burning up (even he complains why I'm so hot when he cuddled me to sleep last night).

I don't want to work. I just want to have some ME time. Away from here, away from everyone. Except my hubby that is. LOL.

Sleepy, sleepy, sleepy...

Angry...

Damn pissed off with mum lah.

 

Story is, me and him came back to Singapore late Monday night. And I wanted to go back to my house to sleep because I miss my room! =p So we just came back to my place without bringing any Mandarin oranges since we thought it was late already, and by the time we wake up nobody will be home, and we also cannot 'bai nian' properly. Besides, it feels like CNY is over liao lor. -_-

 

Then morning mum came and kpkb about us not bringing Mandarin oranges. I explained she still sulk and kpkb somemore. Fine. So at night he after work went home to get the damned oranges and came over with angpow for my mum since she also asked me to give some money to his mum. And he also apologized and explained to my parents.

 

And then she complained to sis that why only give one angpow. And then she came and "talked" to him, nagging him about our traditions, that must give 2 angpows, blah blah blah. What really irks me is the way she puts it. What the hell do you mean by "if your parents never teach you what to do, then I teach you what you should have done"?

 

Hey, are you trying to insinuate that his parents didn't bring him up properly? Never teach him manners? At least his parents never talk to me like that ok!

 

For Chrissake, it's not as if I've done this before. Nor him for that matter. We both don't give a damn about such lame traditions. It's the thought that counts anyway! Why do you need to be so uptight over it? You wanna think that people only give parents one angpow means that one parent is dead, then so be it lah!

 

I'm pissed off by the way she talks to hubby and the way she keeps harping what we have done wrong. I don't see where I'm wrong, ok, maybe the damned oranges part, but I've already explained and he has apologized then just shut your trap already!

 

Since you say I'm already 'jia chu qu' then why must I or him for that matter follow YOUR traditions?! I don't even give a damn for such traditions!

 

And then YOU still can behave so childishly and return my ang pow! WTF?! Lame ass. I promptly returned my hubby's and my angpows. I frankly don't give a damn.

Happy Chinese New Year~!

Gong Hei Fatt Choy everyone~! =p

Haven't been updating regularly. Hahaha.

Nothing much to update too lah. Work sucks as usual, life's good with hubby (with it's usual petty fights and tantrums and then kiss and make-up), well, everything's normal lor.

Chinese New Year as usual was off to hubby's hometown, where it was great to see his nephews again! Adorable, really. =p And everyone was hooked on my PSP lah. *sighs* And the things they say and do, really interesting. =p Didn't take much photos, partly because my handphone has no more memory, partly because my phone sucks lah. -_- I need a new phone.

Anyway, still collected lots of angpows this year! Ok lah, even if it's all in Ringgit. -_- But well, at least can all save in his Maybank account. =p

Tomorrow have to start work already, but still feeling kind of sick. Think I drank a tad bit too much on the last night at his hometown. Yeah, I did 'merlioned' a few times. *sighs* My alcohol tolerance level is not as good as before lah. But hey, at least I'm not like, dead drunk. At least I still can manage to change into my PJs, brush my teeth (though I don't know for what since I'm still puking), and went to bed. Of course, to promptly jump out and dash for the toilet for somemore puking. Lol.

Still having the after effects lor. Not to mention having a slight flu now. -_-

Well, still quite a good Chinese New Year. =)

Till the next time... Ciao...

Pissed Off...

Now my mum says he'll go and do something to my hubby's bike, ask me not to park there anymore. F*** lor. If he dares, I'll call the police. I don't give a damn if he has to go to jail or what. I did what I can, I smsed him in the afternoon to apologize for hitting so hard and made my stand clear. So if he dares to provoke me, I'll definitely will not give face just because he's my brother. Simply because my hubby did nothing to provoke him or what. So if he's gonna take it out on my hubby, he's asking for it. Seriously.

Actually I'm torn between beating the crap out of him and calling the police. See if mum want to see him in jail or in the hospital. Her call.

I mean business. I do as I say.

Sad...

Well, I finally understand why people say that when your parents hit you, they feel the pain in the heart, not the flesh.

Today I slapped my brother real hard on his face. In front of his girlfriend nonetheless. I got nagged by hubby for that, because he said guys have their ego; no matter what, slapping guys in front of other people is a no-no.

Hey, I feel bad enough as it is, slapping him. Hearing this makes me feel so much worse. That I can't stop crying for a whole 10 mins when that scene keeps replaying itself in my head.

And why did I do that in the first place?

I had an sms from my sis yesterday, that our bro was being damn mean and horrible. Then she called me later at night before I went home that he was being mean to his girlfriend again. I won't go into details, but to summarize, he shouted at her, chased her out, dumped her stuff on the floor, threw her stuff downstairs, shoved my sis when she tried to help the girl keep back her stuff. You get my drift.

How can I just ignore when I know about all these? People who know me should know I have been treated badly in previous relationships. Though not as bad as this. So I feel so much hurt for her. Knowing that she like how I was before, can't simply just walk away.

This morning I woke up, they were about to go out. I didn't scold him yet, since everything seems ok. They went out, and I heard him shouting at her again and she trying to explain. It pains me so much ok. To hear a girl having to grovel like that with no dignity. And she's like a meek little mouse who doesn't dare to speak up and all.

So I stormed out and glared at him, asking what the f***'s going on. I confronted him about how I knew about what happened yesterday and he just scolded the girl, "See what you've done!" And I feel so pissed off. I just scolded him and threatened to whack his sorry ass, and he dared to give me that kind of arrogant look, taunting me, provoking me to do as I said. I tell you, his face is the kind you see on those hooligans' face when they want to fight.

I told him that I won't tolerate such nonsense from him, nor allow him to treat the girl like this. He can retort to ask her to leave and he did not force her to stay. What rubbish! I can understand that she doesn't bear to leave. And I cannot stand him mentally abusing her like this.

I know he won't dare to retaliate nor fight me. But I was too pissed off beyond words, frustrated that he doesn't get my point. So I just slapped him across the face and he started tearing. So did I. I feel so bad slapping him like this.

Sigh, don't know lah. I know what I did may make him treat her worser. It may not make a difference. But I just needed to let him know my stand and that I mean business. I really cannot tolerate knowing that another girl is being bullied like that and I do nothing. If my sis ever finds a boyfriend like my bro, I certainly won't just give a slap. I'll give him a good thrashing.

Thank God my hubby is so much a better man. -_-

A Song for My Hubby~

Heard this song the other way, and I just so feel it...

Flaws And All by Beyonce

I'm a train wreck in the morning
I'm a bitch in the afternoon
Every now and then without warning
I can be really mean towards you
I'm a puzzle yes in deed
Ever complex in every way
And all the pieces aren't even in the box
And yet, you see the picture clear as day.

[Chorus]
I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
And that's why I love you [3x]

I neglect you when I'm working
When I need attention I tend to nag
I'm a host of imperfection
And you see past all that
I'm a peasant by some standards
But in your eyes I'm a queen
You see potential in all my flaws
and that's exactly what I need.

[Chorus]
I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
and that's why I love you [3x]

[Repeat Chorus]

Random Post...

• My file is missing! WHERE IS IT?! WHO TOOK IT?! Or maybe I misplaced it? Hmmm...
• I need to clean up my room. I can't find a place to sleep at night. =x It needs a major overhaul I tell you! I'm so NOT looking forward to Project Clean-up.
• I want more money! So many things I wanna buy. New phone for myself and him, new PC for him, new hair colour.
  
• I want a long holiday! Sian of work. I need to rejuvenate myself.
  
• I hate menses. It gives me cramps and tempers. No wonder the whole of last week I'm so easily irritable. Not to mention me cursing and swearing at little things. -_-
• Guys are superficial. Most guys. Always judge by looks. Just because my picture, it has generated lots of guys messages and comments. About how sweet, how pretty, and other flirting lines. Lame.
  
• I feel so sian sometimes that I just wanna go away to some remote place with just my iPod, PSP, story books. It's like, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE ALREADY!
• I'm itchy to bash somebody up. Just waiting for the opportunity, for some stupid idiot who comes and antagonize me or my ah lao.
• I hate most guys. They piss me off. Especially motorists (drivers and riders alike) who are KNN CCBs. Never signal when cutting into other lanes, tailgating, insinuating my ah lao being one of those bad riders, show-off their powerful bikes, etc.
• I'm just in an extremely foul mood today. And I foresee for the rest of the week. So beware. I bite.
  

A Brand New Year...

And I foresee my favourite colour for this year is... RED~! =p

Bought new red Elmo soft toy cum handphone accessory (but too big, so hang on my make-up pouch instead), new PSP slim in red, new make-up pouch in red, red lighter... Maybe gonna dye red colour too! =x

Speaking of hair, I went to cut a new hairstyle! I've got a short fringe! =p Long time no short fringe already, so not used to it. So coincidentally, Bui also cut her fringe short! =D Not used to this hair, apparently the back of my hair needs to be like, scrunched abit, to create this out-of-bed, tousled look. Only he knows how, and he styled it for me before I thought it was too, not me, so I smoothed it back down. Hahaha. =x He's just good at styling lah. =)

He also cut his hair. Interesting! I like... =D Short in front and sides, and a long tail at the back. Lol. I think daddy's gonna flip when he sees his new hairstyle. =x He's now in Taiwan I think. Should I email him my hubby's photo of his new hairstyle? I think he'll get insomnia instantly. *chuckles*

Happy that I got the PSP! =D It's well-worth the money, seeing how it's being fully utilized. When I'm at work, he's playing with it. When I'm at his place, I play with it. When I'm home, usually my sis's hooked on it. Occasionally, my bro plays with it. ^_^ And bro helped me download more games into my PSP. Now got Crazy Taxi! I can't wait to play that lor! Yesterday he downloaded liao, he was stuck in his room with my PSP. Then my sis went to take from him to play until I went to his place. And then I was busy playing his computer to bother with my PSP and now it's with him. -_-

Oh well, nothing much liao! Going to Malaysia again to dye my hair. Broke lah, can't cut and dye in Singapore. =p

Time really flies, soon another Chinese New Year. Make me remember spending last year's Chinese New Year with him and his family. =)

Suddenly very nostalgic...

Update...

I'm so happy!

Bought my first ever tech gadget... PSP Slim! In HAWT HAWT RED! I LOVE IT!

Received my bonus mah, not much, but well, better than nothing. I know, some people may say money not earned easily, crazy to splurge like this. But well, I just wanted to pamper myself for once. Since when you see me buy like, really good stuff for myself? Ok, other than the fact of my recent necklace addiction. =p This is my first ever expensive toy I've ever bought for myself ok! So the feeling is different from getting it for free or someone buying it for me. =p Besides, I've already thought for very long before buying it ok!

Anyhow, was so excited upon getting it that I can't help but grin like mad for the next few days and proudly parading it around and playing with it. To hell to those who think I'm being show-off or 'hao lian'. I'm just like a kid who is excited about her new toy mah. What's wrong? =x I need new games though. Anyone wanna give me games for my PSP? =p I'm currently addicted to Diner Dash... Hohoho... =x

Oh, and my ah lao say my expression and stance when I play the racing car game on my PSP is damn interesting. He knows when I'm turning or going straight. Apparently, I hold the PSP the way people hold and maneuver the steering wheel. -_- LOL.

Speaking of driving. Another Singapore Customs booboo from yours truly. =p Remember the first incident where I made the peace sign when the Customs officer asked who's the owner of the passport and it's me? =x This time, was on his bike, and when we come back to Singapore, the Customs will check the boxes of the bikes right? His bike no box, only under the seat there's a compartment where we usually put our raincoats. We lazy to get off, and when the Customs officer asked "Got anything?" I replied, "No box." My ah lao laughed like mad lor, and he never failed to recount this incident to his other friends. -_- Funny meh? True mah... No box = nothing what. Then ah lao say the officer can also see that there's no box. -_-

Oh well, kind of bimbotic behaviour. Lol. =x

Ok lah, nothing much liao... Update another time!!